This restlessness

A week has passed. you wake up, go through the motions (on autopilot mostly), retire for the nite and the same thing repeats itself over and over again. its senseless days like this that eats away at time and before you know it, just like the poor 'ole frog caught in a slow burning pot of water, its too late to leap away.

Aku rimas, jiwa ku resah & gelisah. bukan setakat berkeluh kesah mengenang dan merindui orang jauh (yes i am missing you so much Abe) tapi kegelisahan ini kegelisahan yang lebih mendalam.... makan kenyang tapi kurang nikmat, mandi basah tapi kurang segar, tidur lena tapi kurang nyenyak. outwardly everything seems ok but on a deeper level, serba tak kena. so i think its that time again. in fact i know its that time again since past experience has shown me that this restlessness is but an internal alarm that's triggered whenever i start straying from my most Beloved.

Oh where are my bearings? what have i accomplished and where am i headed?


Sebenarnya hati ini cinta kepada Mu
Sebenarnya diri ini rindu kepada Mu
Tapi aku tidak mengerti mengapa cinta masih tak hadir?
Mengapa rindu belum berbunga?
Ku cuba menghulurkan sebuah hadiah kepada Mu
Tapi mungkin kerana isinya tidak sempurna, tiada seri
Ku cuba menyiramkan nya agar tumbuh dan berbunga
Tetapi mungkin kerana airnya tidak sesegar telaga kauthar

Sesungguhnya walau ku kutip semua permata di dasar lautan
Sesungguhnya walau ku siram dgn air hujan dari tujuh langit Mu
Namun cinta takkan hadir dan rindu takkan berbunga
Jika tidak mengharap rahmat Mu
Dan menagih simpati pada Mu, ya Allah
Tuhan hadiahkan lah kasih Mu kepada ku
Tuhan kurniakan lah rindu ku kepada Mu
Moga ku tahu syukur ku adalah milik Mu

( RAIHAN)


Week (sun 16/04/06 - sun 23/04/06) in a flash:

Sun 16 - While we were out watching GUBRA, Abe was at Archmal with friends, a place known for its natural healing centres a couple of hours drive from Ashgabat. its underground water has volcanic sulphur which is supposed to be good for the body and the centres offer 10 day packages at USD50 for locals with hostels as lodging (tapi foreigners kena charge 5 - 10x more) - apparently me 'ole darlin' just had one dip, nak merasa. on the way back he also stopped by the Turkmenbasynyn Ruby Mescidd (certainly a mouthful lol), asia's largest mosque and the world's 3rd.

The Ruby Mescidd (masjid), Turkmenistan..... whats with the coke bottle i wonder lol?!?

Mon 17 - Tasik morning run, 4km in 35 mins. then it was work as usual.

Tues 18 - 1 hr aerobics & dance right after work.

Wed 19 - Was out on site throughout the day. 1st stop was joint monthly valuation @ galeri di raja klang, then on to the balairongseri @ istana alam shah to check out a couple of quotations. after lunch followed the bosses and other committee members to check out the facilities @ sunway lagoon resort in preparation for a function in mid may. thoroughly pooped out by the end of it.

Thurs 20 - 1 hr aerobics - repetitive exercises similar to cindy crawford's workout (my poor aching muscles lol) & added another 15 mins of slow treadmill jog @ maksak mini gym.

Fri 21 - Brought mak to see her best friend undergoing chemo @ HUKM during the long lunchbreak. alhamdulillah auntie M seems cheery enough.

Sat 22 - Chores galore in the morning. bought stuff for AI's interview on sunday, a confidence booster of sorts. later pounded the treadmill @ KSAS: 30 mins, 4km, speed 8-9, incline 1, 300 kj burned.

Sun 23 - AI's interview @ UiTM and judging from his reaction, he probably didnt do too badly. hoping for the best and thanks to KT for the tips. Again went treadmill pounding @ KSAS, almost a repeat of previous workout: 30 mins, 4km, speed 8-9, incline 1, 300 kj but added brisk walking: 10 mins, 1 km, speed reduced to 6, incline increased to 4, 80 kj burned. PUAS.

Yay yay

Sunday morning came bright and sunny and there i was, staring at the familiar lake, hesitant and anxious. if anyone had the time or inclination to notice (which i doubt they did) i must have painted a rather pitiful picture, dare i try it out and run as i usually do, or just melenggang like a mak nenek going to the pasar ?!?

Of course i ran, albeit slowly, but once i felt the solid pavement at my feet and the cool wind against my face, i forgot all about my fear of terpukang at the track. once you get hooked on the endorphin rush, its hard to let go lol. of course when you get to my age you dont have the luxury of acting like a reckless moron anymore so kena la hati2, taking one 1km lap at a time. glad to report i made it through 4 laps, making it a total of 4km in 40 mins!!!! yay even if i've added 10 mins to my usual time but hey, at least i'm running again lol.

But i was still careful right after the run though. what if my happy happy joy joy mood was broken by a bout of light headedness? or what if my ticker went beserk on me? who was i going to turn to, heck who'd drive me home? tapi alhamdulillah, even by the end of the day all i was feeling was euphoria.... osso a little ache and pain here and there la. after all i'd been going about like a pregnant primadonna for a couple of weeks already hehehe!!

Even took the kids out to tgv for GUBRA. i need a whole post to talk about that i would think.

Till later.

Stoopid bug

Hmmmphhh.

I've been in the grips of this darn flu for sometime now and it looks like i havent managed to totally severe its tenacious grips quite just yet. still feeling slightly naseuous especially after eating and kinda woozy after lying prone for long periods of time - like when i'm in my room reading or staring away at the idiot box.

The headaches and nausea that rocked me was bad enough to even start some sorta speculation among my officemates. they seem to think 'twas highly likely little old me (as in NOT SO little but really really OLD me) might be baking buns in her microwave again!!!!!!!!!!!! heheh, can you imagine such a thing and with AH almost 14?! haiyaa.... sudah tua maaa lol but they seem almost sure that the periodal separation between the hubs and me could be working its 'magic', that the supposedly intense intimacy arising from such union or 're'union or whatever lol, would surely pave the way for an umm... org baru. laaaa weeeh nak tergelak pun ada, seriau pun ada!!!!

Riuh jugak la sbb maklum saja la an old coot like me nak memboyot lagi (mak ai buruk nye rupa lol) and it didnt help that i'd also asked one of the girls to pls get me some assam2 tidbits when they were headed for tesco (actually it was for the mual taste i seem to be constantly having in my mouth lately - classic symptoms eh). BUT, yeah, i guess i just had to burst everyone's bubble (everyone 'cept my own - to be honest, i'm scared shitless) bcoz as of yesterday, my monthly has paid me a visit!!

So like i said, its this stupid stupid bug and i hate it. wanna run but not that adventurous to start my normal routine again. takut terpitam kat track sengsorang takde sape nak kutip. which raises the question of me finding a compatible running buddy, yet again.

Sememangnya..

...... kita hanya merancang. LOL life really IS full of suprises!!!!!!!!!!



Yes, i did get to go to my primary school reunion last sunday *HUGE GRIN* and if you have super duper eyesight, you'd probably be able to make out the miniscule black presence (i have this rather strong attachement to anything dark) of yours truly at the extreme left lol

I'd psyched myself up enough to reluctantly put all thoughts of the much anticipated reunion aside, when come saturday, the hubby tersengeh2 sidled to me and says, "eh, i've pushed my flight to monday night tau, is that all right with you?!!"

Weeehhhh..... was that all right with me??!!! was he kidding??!?! lol of course la it was VERY alright with me. it not only meant another day with him around but it also meant i could go to mentakab!!!! triple yay!!!! the man gladly gave me the consent to 'disappear' on sunday... reason being he also wanted to 'disappear' to his beloved green lol so it was a fair trade.

Since my going was all last minute, i didnt make any convoy plans with the kl gang so my AI jadi la mangsa mama dia as the bodyguard. i wasnt about to travel alone no sirree!!!! its been ages since i was last in mentakab and i definately didnt fancy getting lost alone lol.

Everyone there was surprised to see me to say the very least lol because i'd already put out a rather emotional 'announcement' regarding my absence earlier. but i thank god and providence for clearing the way for me to meet up with so many old and dear friends....... and teachers as well!!!!!!!!! a really priceless opportunity. oh, and i finally met up with dr in the house, the wife of one of my old mates; both bloggers!!! hope to continue our sembang sometime soon :)

My brain's a little sluggish this morning bcoz i'm down with flu (too much excitement kot lol) and also still in 'mild' shock after sending the man off last nite. after a month of berkepit kesana sini, i'm now just half of a couple again *SIGH* will write summore about the fun i had last sunday with all my mates later. just hope this flu doesnt get any worse.