Revamp

Heh.. i did it, i did it!!!!! *rubbing hands gleefully, mad grin pasted on face*

That was the most worthwhile lunch break i've had in years. sakit pinggang2 lol. for those of you who frequents jaya jusco, you'd know today's the last day of the so-called privillege shopping for j-card members. i've let my membership lapse for years but lucky me, a kind friend lent me her card along with the privillege invite (w/out which you wouldnt be getting any special discounts).

I'm no shopper (it makes me positively ill sometimes) but it was something i just had to do. how was i ever going to revamp my sad excuse of a bedroom if i didnt go out and buy myself stuff lol. so, since Abe's coming home this saturday what better timing eh?

I've been sick of the blue theme for quite some time now but alas, as usual, i'd given in to procrastination (the story of my life). Since its the season for weddings (cuti sekolah kan) and mags are full of nothing else i've allowed my head to be filled with rather grandiose ideas hehe..... ruffles, laces, ribbons... ahhhh the whole feminine thang (which i usually am not but hell, maybe its time i grooved to the sugar n spice and everything nice tune for a change lol). i was thinking soft lilac with splashes of deep rich purple here and there. hmmmm... maybe, maybe.

And when i walked into the bedlinen/soft furnishing dept, i promptly fell in love with the most beautiful set of bedsheets there (just my opinion laa). its lavender with just the right amount of frills and laces... exactly what i had in mind!! it wasnt really within my budget but then again, i thought what the heck... live dangerously woman, s-p-e-n-d lol. funny thing though, the salesperson thought i wanted it for a wedding (apparently ramai yg beli for that purpose), probly untuk anak or something but i told him, bukan tapi untuk pengantin tua hehehehe.

So these few nites, i guess i'll be rather occupied fixing the room up.

p.s. Oh lahleeeng ah... 3 days to go :)

Runs in the family?

Today AI is facing his worse nightmare - the dreaded chemistry paper!!!! cant really blame the guy. like him, i couldnt make much sense of it either lol. tapi bila dah science student, kenalah buat gak kan... and ma's duas are always with you kiddo.

By the end of the day AF would've completed his puasa 6 and i guess from now till friday (AI's last paper) i'll be fasting alone. we'll probly be 'celebrating' his preserverance at KSAS tonite, also an excuse for moi not to cook lol. the clubhouse is getting more run down by the minute but the foods still ok. something has to be done to save the place but i dont think the state govt's in any position to be saving anyone/anything right now. AH's cousin lina has been sleeping over for the past 2 nites which means i've been having 2 giggly teenagers as my teman tidur. i remember those days when i too had lots and lots to giggle about lol. the major topic being boyz - of course..... seems that AH's crush is now somewhere in trengganu but will be back by friday because he n his mates have a date with a haunted house!!! bebudak sekarang macam2... ada hati gak nak jadi ghostbusters lol.

The office is almost empty by now. most have gone to our pengarah's open house. a little late in syawal perhaps but he just got back from a trip to the US of A. when it comes to travelling, i dont think any of the other pengarahs can beat him. To each their own. Me, i'm in a rather murky mood... had to abort my run this morning. Couldnt find what i was looking for (one of Abe's account no.) and left the house later than usual. doesnt take much to skew an already very tight schedule.

Thus the glums.

Ah well.

p.s. Abe weh, 4 days and counting !!!!!!!!

... I hope you're doing fine out there without me
'Cause I'm not doing so good without you
The things I thought you'd never know about me
Were the things I guess you always understood
So how could I have been so blind for all these years
Guess I only see the truth through all this fear
Living without you

And everything I have in this world
And all that i'll ever be
It could all fall down around me
Just as long as I have you right here by me

I can't take another day without you '
Cause, baby, I could never make it on my own
I've been waiting so long just to hold you
And to be back in your arms where I belong
I'm sorry I can't always find the words to say
Everything I've ever known gets swept away
Inside of your love

And everything I have in this world
All that i'll ever be
It could all fall down around me
Just as long as I have you right here by me

As the days roll on I see
Time is standing still for me
And you're not here
I'm sorry I can't always find the words to say
Everything I've ever known gets swept away
Inside of your love.. x2

And everything I have in this world
And all that i'll ever be
It could all fall down around me
Just as long as I have you right here by me

Here By Me - 3 doors down

'TER'sibuk

Weh !!!! its been awhile since i last blogged. theres been a lot of 'going ons' lately and to top that, once all 3 kids are home, my time at the pc is almost NIL. if its not one its the other lol and i'm guessing if the puter could scream we would all be deaf by now.

ok then... Highlights:

Friday 18/11/05 - Took a day's leave just so AI the Potter fanatic (who's also sitting for his spm) could watch the goblet of fire and get it out of his system.

Tuesday 22/11/05 - Took another day's leave to chaperone cik AH on her 1st group date at mid valley.... a huge group actually but there was only one person that mattered of course lol. Some of them went by the commuter, some by car and i ended up carting 2 of her girlfriends. Of course i made myself scarce once we got there (tapi ada laa intai skit2 heheh). whoa... it was a looooong day and my butt almost turned to stone by the end of it. i window shopped, ate, window shopped summore, read and even watched a movie - cello - the most boring scary movie i have ever had the misfortune to watch. it's korean and i thought mesti scary giler bcoz the asians have a way with the supernatural tapi BORING. but AH sure had a good time, i think ;)

Friday 25/11/05 - On leave from work again. This time for a big 'do'. Joe, the hubby's elder bro, was getting a brand new first 'menantu' heheh. It was the day that his eldest son got hitched.... and everything was settled after asar. A simple bernikah ceremony at the state mosque and tadaaaaaaa - a married man already lol. all the best reez dan semoga bahagia dunia akhirat.

Saturday 26/11/05 - The Bersanding ceremony at the bride's. Reez memang pandai cari isteri... the entourage just had to travel less than 10 mins because they both live in seksyen 8 lol. alhamdulillah everything went pretty smoothly, considering; lets not dwell upon the hiccups.

Sunday 27/11/05
- Had the chores taken care in record time and was lazing about relaxing with the kids (AF had decided on fasting) when we received word of mak long kiah's demise... al-fatihah. 'twas stroke, heart attack or something related. and though we wanted to go back to manjung, mak's still feeling under the weather and AI still has his spm papers. so i guess we'll just have to rely on mak ngah & pak ngah to sort things out over at the other end.
- Today is also moving day for Abe. seems that he'd managed to come up with a pretty decent deal: a 3 bedroom house complete with maid, gardener, security and check this out.... a car as well as driver!!! wow, never heard of a house rental that comes with its own car & driver before lol. things must be pretty peachy (or desperate, depending on which way you want to look at it) down in turkmenistan. fed up with the lousy food, Abe lost no time in getting some bachelors over to cook him mackerels (straight from the can i bet lol) ... his favourite!! yeah, he's a no fuss hubby *wink* but if anyone's starting to feel a smite sorry for the guy, just dont ok, bcoz the food may be lousy but dining out also means having belly dancers for entertainment!! sheesh... why is it that guyz always have all the fun ?!?!!

Abe if you're reading this, i'll post the pics soon ok - i'm off for a joint valuation in a while and i dont wanna be late :)

** Running Log **

Not running as much as i want to *sigh*

Sat & Sun - short evening runs around the tasik about 2 km just before maghrib. hmmm, asalkan buat. So today i made sure i woke up all geared up and ready to go.... and after the run, barely made it to the office with only 2 mins to spare. Pheww.

The usual - 1 lap: about 4 km: 30 mins bare minimum (cooling down not possible).

Pancit

Heh.

I've been fasting and running since monday and today's testament to the fact that i'm probably overdoing things a bit here. gawd pancit giler !!!!!!! i still managed to complete the full route within 30 mins tapi penat giler siot.

Sweating rivulets have never made me thirsty so i dont have any problems related to thirst. more like delipated body and depleted energy. hmmm... i guess i should give it a skip tomorrow and spend some aerobic time with katie smith or cindy crawford, or emulate paula abdul's dance moves instead.

But running serves a dual purpose for me. it's empowering and energising.. i used to be pretty lethargic most of the time. it ensures i get a good nites sleep (terpukang is more like it lol).. i used to have insomniacal tendencies and usually still up and about till the wee hours.

I'm facing old age and need my beauty sleep ;)

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** Running Log **

I drop AI off, run and punch in for work.

Mon - 1 lap= about 4 km= 25 mins ( i was feeling light on my feet).

Tues - 1 lap plus= about 4 km plus= 35 mins

Wed - 1 lap= about 4 km= 30 mins (but extremely hard going).

Stop whizzing will ya!

Everything around me is moving a little too fast to my liking right now.

I need to get my equilibrium back and fast.

I've been stuffing my face takde kesian punye - sumbat till i puke. and the only thing that can trigger this awful bout of bingeing is unresolved worry/trouble/anxiety. even though i've long buried my dark bullimic past, this is getting a little too close for comfort.

*deep calming breaths* come on you can do it.... face the serabut head on.

So Abe's away - but life goes on woman. even if you always get a little 'weng' or out of sync when he's not around for long periods of time, deal with it.

AI's spm - even though the old ticker skips a beat everytime you think about it, if he says its ok then its ok. insyallah, have faith and just carry on with the fasting and the solat sunnats.

Mak - she's always been the boss of her so even if she's not well and complaining of headaches, body aches etc, you'll never get her to see the doctor until she's ready. worry is useless... no means NO and forcing has NEVER worked.

SIL - even if she did have a mild stroke on monday, she's out of the woods now and has all her children looking after her. stop feeling bad about not visiting her, you'll see her when you can.

MIL - of course she's affected by all that has happened. the SIL's been living with her since she was widowed 2 years ago. and she also misses her son and worries about him no matter what you say. just keep dropping by daily to check on her and spend the nite when all is settled with mak and AI. she has others with less on their hands so let go of the guilt!!

Work - whatdaya expect? its year's end. buat ape yang termampu, do what you have to do.

To unserabut the serabut.

Hmmmmm.

You are not atlas and nobody expects you to hold up the world.

OK.

Latest pics of the furry ones

A follow up of the chewie & nico story.... their latest pics.

Chewbaca OGB (Opah's Golden Boy)... fat & lovable but definitely a scaredy cat. mak's favourite.

Nicholei OBB (One Ball Bandit)... playful, naughty, extremely manja, hunter of roaches & lizards.

... and you can guess who's favourite lol. since daddy's been away, they've been inseparable.

(Intermission: in between preparing lunch for my coz n family. its still raya)

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** Running Log **

Sadly, i couldnt squeeze in any running time this morning but just a short one before maghrib. i dont think i even hit the 2 km mark before the azan sounded but better than nothing i say.

yesterday, i logged in the usual 4 km :)

Older women

I think its heightened awareness or something. i read about it somewhere but i cant remember the details (typical me). its like you're in a packed stadium. you close your eyes and think of nothing but yellow shirts. once you open your eyes again, you'll find yourself suddenly surrounded by people in yellow shirts.... something you hadnt even noticed before.

Same thing when i found out that AF was suffering from hole in the heart or vsd. i wasnt even aware of the condition prior to it but suddenly i found myself literally bumping into so many other people with the same problem. Or the day you start driving a certain car.... suddenly the road seem to be flooded with the same model & colour lol. And other similar stuff.

Right now? Its about older women. i'm noticing the younger men around me are falling for older women. 2 nephews, a cousin plus 1 officemate. the thing is, they seem to be getting a lot of flak about it especially from their parents. i dunno... personally i dont think theres anything wrong with it so long as both parties are serious and equally aware of what they're getting into. i agree it does have the potential of being extremely challenging but what relationship doesnt? and we cant deny the fact that our beloved prophet did have a most rewarding and cherished union with khadijah.

I enjoy a good rapport with the younger people in our large extended family especially on the hubby's side but somehow that makes the older folks a little wary of me. *sigh* puhleeze, its not a popularity contest and i'm not out to score points.... i just empathize more with the kids, thats all. they're people too, with hopes & feelings and would love to be respected that little bit more.

A nephew thats very close to me is going thru a very hard time. he's trying to get over a terrible road accident... one that he had with his girlfriend, a girl his mom isnt too keen on to put it mildly. i dont know why (and he confesses he doesnt know either lol) but he's always been attracted to older girls and because his mom hates it, he goes about it secretly. its sad that he has to resort to slinking around and i have adviced him to either stop or have it out with his mom. apparently he has done neither and the accident brought everything out in the open. they both suffered serious injuries and involve a certain disfigurement to the girl's face.

The poor lad's been discouraged to see the girl and his mom is using everything she's got to break them up. i honestly dont think he was all that serious about the relationship to begin with, but the accident kinda changed things. i mean sharing a near death experience would naturally create some sort of special bond, a closeness. and i'm sure there's quite a measure of guilt thrown in regardless of whether its warranted or not. he has to be given the chance to face his feelings, examine it and hopefully make the right decisions as to where the relationship is headed. i've cautioned him that basing a relationship on guilt and sympathy alone was going to be disastrous. there has to be love. i still think denying him that certain freedom is only pushing him into a tight corner and isnt helping him one bit.

Now that he's up and about, he admits that they're seeing each other again but still without his mom's knowledge nor consent. again, i've adviced him to come clean but this time he says, he has his dad on his side so he's not too worried. *sigh* i still dont like it (i would be soo hurt if kept in the dark that way) and i personally think he's sitting on a time bomb. but i guess they know what they're doing and i can only pray that it would turn out well for all parties concerned.

People have been saying its easy for me to be open minded since its not my kid thats involved. i've spent some time really really thinking about it. yes i admit, if the boyz were dating an older girl i sure as hell would caution them to be very sure. such a relationship would have its own peculiarities and challenges and they'd have to be ascertive enough as a man to make it work. its ok if its just a couple of years separating them. i dont want to offend anyone but if the gap in years is too big, in the long run the men could be facing problems in the sexual aspect. they should anticipate the effects of their partner's menopause and be willing to make certain sacrifices. i know this for a fact because a close friend has made me his confidant in such matters and i can assure you that right now, the problems he's facing is pretty real. if one is contemplating marriage, there is much to consider. but i also feel that an older woman could be more understanding and supportive due to her experience & maturity and if that is what a man is seeking in a relationship, so be it.

And i still stand by the fact that, especially in the matters of the heart, we can only give our advice and opinion, the pros & the cons. because in the end, its all up to the person in question to determine their own happiness. and as parents, after absolving our responsibility in dispensing what we think is the right advice, we should stand by the children. it may be the right choice or it may not, but who's to know what the future holds? so, tak payah la pening2 sangat.... berusaha & berdoa and leave the rest in the all knowing hands of the AlMighty.

We made time for solat jemaah at the surau tonite. i've decided without Abe, the malam jumaat's would be spent with the rest of the jemaah at the surau. It would be something to do for me & the kids, and a break for AI who has been designated the new imam at home for maghrib & isya, a post that AF will be taking over once he's home for term break.

I've also gotten myself a new x-pax pact from celcom. seems that i can receive Abe's sms's via maxis but he hasnt been getting any of mine and the problem would only be resolved if i had a 019 line. so tadaaaaa..... mengalahkan towke babi (hehehe) i'm now going about with 2 h/phones lol

p.s. i sure am missing you hon

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** Running Log **

I was late leaving the house so just managed a short session this morning (otherwise i wouldnt have been able to punch in on time lol).

2 small laps (mosque route)= about 2.5 km= 20 mins

The Story of Chewie & Nico

Life's been that bit more colourful with the addition of the furry ones. More so now that Abe's not around, the kitties are doing more than their fair share of cheering up the kids (and me).

So let me write a little bit about how they happen to be in our lives.

My 3 kids have some form of allergy or other - AF has eczema, AI has asthma and AH sneezes and breaks out in rashes whenever she's in close contact with furry animals namely cats. Being animal lovers (which kid isnt?), they'd always wanted to have some sort of pet to call their own but because of the severity of their conditions, they had to contend with the occasional petting with the neighbour's cats, guinea pigs, mice or whatever.

Everytime they came to me with their pleas, my answer was always "wait till sya is in secondary school or until mama pencen" and even if they were not expecting anything else from me, they were still disappointed.

When AH hit 13 this year, i had no choice but to let them try it out. But my one condition was, if AH kept breaking up in rashes as before, we were to abort the whole thing and wait till i decided to pension off (which would probably defeat the whole purpose bcoz the kiddos would already be off somewhere anyway).

So, the moment the neighbourhood stray had her litter (she mates with the various persians that my neighbours seem to be having) we took our pick of the cutest & most playful. I wanted just one because it was after all going to be an experimental exercise of sorts, but mak said it was better if we took in a pair.... "boleh dia main2 sama" she said. And because i didnt want a female cat (takut beranak tak berenti) we took our time in choosing our 2 kitties.

To the best of our limited ability, we finally chose what looked like 2 male kitties (and of course at 3 months identifying their gender was not an easy thing to do lol). But during the ensuing frenzy of naming the furry ones, we reversed our opinion and agreed that probably one of them was a female after all. After much deliberation (the kids were just short of tearing each other's hair off lol), we finally named the greyish one nico (short for nicholas) and the brownish one megu (short for megumi-chan).

But when we hauled them to the vet (for fleas, kurap and whatever - they were pretty dirty strays), we were told that both were probably male but they were still too small to know for sure. So holding on to the fact that the kitties deserved a proper name at least, again we had another brainstorming session and megu became chewbaca. And much to our delight, as they slowly got used to us, we also noticed that AI's asthma was under control and AH was just sneezing occasionally.

As the kitties grew, we had another reversal of opinion.... chewie's genitals were getting more and more prominent and there was no doubting his gender but nico was starting to look more like a female with each passing day. we couldn't see anything resembling the familiar 'balls/nuts/scrotum' whatever!!!!! So we were faced with the same dilemma yet again, what on earth were we going call 'her' now? In the end we decided to keep it nico but short for nicotina instead (AF was smoking then thus the connection with nicotene).

So we had the gender thing settled once and for all, and when we brought them over to the Jabatan Haiwan's clinic for their shots, we registered them as such. And its been that way for their following visits - chewie's purging episode and the infected boil.

But guess what happended when we went over yesterday for their 2nd flu shot??? hehehe.... turned out nico actually is a male, just like we initially suspected way back when. And how did that come about you might say?

We've all been curious as to why nico's been practising these 'male mating' moves with chewy (vice versa) when he's supposed to be a female and why he's been caught by mak a couple of times peeing upright like a tom cat. was there such a thing as a 'tomboy' female feline, we wondered? The question remain unanswered until one day the kiddos (AI & AH) came to me with the idea that nico could just be '2 alam' i.e. both male & female at the same time. apparently they had found what looked like half a scrotum i.e. just 1 ball (they must've poked and prodded poor old nico to no end lol). so we highlighted the fact to the vet, and he confirmed the fact that nico was definitely a male and did have only 1 ball to his name. a little uncommon but not all that unusual it seems.

So nico is now officially nicholei (we feel its much more macho sounding than plain old nicholas and he does need all the help he can get with just 1 ball) and the proud owners of 2 male cats. We're done with the gender issue and the renaming lol.

Because, no matter what we already love them both to bits :)

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** Running Log **

Its my 1st day at work after a long Raya break, and since i dont have any kiddos to drop off, squeezing in a morning run was easy. But of course i couldnt afford any dilly dallying and it was a straight, no nonsense lap round the tasik.

1 lap= about 4 km= 25 mins (yee haa... a fast one for me).

New sleeping partner

Yes, i have a new one.... a spanking new sleeping partner. Now that Abe is away, an immediate substitute is absolutely necessary otherwise that empty space beside me would haunt me to no end and i might as well forget about having a restful nite ever again.

So, lucky for me AH has most graciously volunteered to help me get through my lonely nights (read: gleefully anticipating romping all over the big bed lol). She's already planning midnite movie marathons, anime sessions, read outs, etcetra, etcetra. It seems she has also invited the cats to share 'our' bed (i can just picture the horror on Abe's face lol). i woke up in the middle of the nite with nico under the comforter and chewy snuggling at my feet !!

I'd probably be having additional 'squatters' as well. The boyz have been known to bunk out on my floor now and then, but now it'd probably be more often than usual with everything that AH is planning.

Ah well, the more the merrier i'd say :)

p.s. I miss you lots you grumpy mumpy man you !!!

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** Running Log **

I've been pretty frustrated about my almost non existent running schedule during ramadhan but i guess things should be getting back to normal soon. I started doing my laps consistently again since monday and that means my regular dose of endorphins :)

Mon 7/11/05 - 1 lap plus= 4 km plus= 40 mins

Tues 8/11/05 - 1 lap= about 4 km= 30 mins

Selamat Menyambut Eidil Fitri

OOhh how i've wanted to log on and wish one and all the best Hari Raya possible.... but so much to do and sooooo little time!!!!!!!!!!!

Neeways Selamat Hari Raya, Maaf Zahir & Batin.

Warmest Regards,
Latiffa & Family.