When the children are all grown

"Ma, dont get into a frenzy or anything.. (silence) tapi kan... (another silence) hari tu kepala ijat terkena kipas"

Aduh la weh... tersirap darah mama ni sampai i thought i'd pop a vein!! macamana laa boleh jadi camtu anak, kan mama dah pesan dan pesan lagi, taking utmost care of your head is numero uno on your priority list. takkan laa senang sangat lupa your own medical history sayang ooi!!!!

I have a septate uterus or uterus subseptae - its a condition where the uterus has a midline septum. fortunately for me the division stops about halfway through (there are people with their uterus totally divided into two) but the area that makes up the abnomality is almost a no man's land i.e. tak subur. a fetus unfortunate enough to be growing from that area will not be getting much in the way of nutrients from the mother. that is exactly what happened to my second baby.... weighing at only 1.97kg AI could've easily passed off as a preemie except that he was carried full term. very delicate inside out, he somehow had an infarct at 8 months and was rendered half-paralysed. syukur alhamdulillah he regained full mobility after 2 weeks and has been alright ever since. but the traumatic incident has left me very very very cautious & sensitive about anything to do with his head.

Haaa... now imagine my reaction upon hearing news of his fan accident!!!! dah seminggu yang lalu pulak tu, budak bertuah!!! memang hati ni dah berdetik, gusar, bila tenguk low ceiling kat bilik bebudak tu dulu. most definitely doubledecker beds, low ceilings and ceiling mounted fans do not mix tapi dah memang macam tu kat asrama tu. ish, terus nak terbang je kat dia tapi since tak boleh, was already making plans to drive down to melaka first thing the next morning - but he wouldnt let me. dia kata ada feskem or something (dunno but i'm guessing 'feskem' is 'festival kemerdekaan' kot) and students semua busy dengan pre-merdeka preparations. memang at the time we were having the conversation dia tengah sibuk berlatih boria. he'd already seen the campus doc and treated for external cut/wound. nothing to worry about ma he said.

Hmmphhh.

After consulting with his abah, i finally agreed to wait until he came home for semester break (in a weeks time tapi aduh lamanya rasa!!). we'll then see what the family doctor has to say about all this.

Tu lah ek... bila anak2 masih kecik2 lagi apa2 pun terjadi masih di depan mata and to a certain extent within our control tapi bila dah besar panjang.... yang termampu hanyalah iringan doa yang berpanjangan.

Please please please take care of yourselves kiddoes. mama sayang sangat kat korang.