Plans gone awry

.. again kita hanya merancang.

The day started out well. AH suddenly decided to ditch her tennis lessons (ha tido lambat kan dah susah nak bangun) which meant i could go have some mad fun with the other aerobically inclined makciks & pakciks at the dataran, yay!! and who did i find waiting to start off the session this morning? none other than the funky instructor they nicknamed 'too phat' bcos his speciality was hip-hop aerobics. yo man... i was grinning even before the music started. why? bcos it was my kinda workout yall :)

One thing about being in a large group of people.. you can just let yourself go without worrying too much about looking stupid bcos everyone else would be looking just as stupid hahaha. yup it was fun hip-hopping about like a crazed cow yeehaa ;)

It was then that things started getting a lil skewed.

I wanted to run round the tasik but couldnt bcos AH's girlfrens were coming over for some girly-girl time and also some cookie baking while they're at it. so maid-less me had to settle all the chores as well as spruce the place up a bit before they arrived.... which in the end they never did bcos turns out most couldnt make it so the plan was scraped.

Aah well.

I wanted to attend the wedding reception of my old old friend megan (we go way back to primary school) but couldnt bcos the other car was still in the workshop and golfman was using the only wheels available. then there was also the matter of dropping son no. 2 off to melaka so it was another plan down the drain.

Aaaah weeell.

And something's not too right with my hp either. reception? battery? dunno but it sure is acting up.

Aaaaaaaahhh!!

So what happened was we ended up..
1) baking the choc chip cookies ourselves (yummy but the calories ooh the calories)
2) shoving the uncooperative hp into the deepest darkest corner of my handbag
3) leaving for lendu after maghrib (after much dilly dallying)
4) arriving back home around 11pm totally pooped and not at all ready to face another week of daily grind :(

Heck where did the weekend go? I am soooo not looking forward to going thru the whole 'drop-AH-to-school-then-drop-golfman-to-lrt kelana jaya-before-going-to-work' routine tomorrow morning. the kereta panas giler sbb compressor rosak doesnt even sound that bad now.

Cant we just skip the suburbian madness somehow?

Workout Log
AM - 50 mins moderate aerobics

'K' who?

You 'K'? who's K? you ok, me not ok.

Everyone knows about Datuk 'K' (who doesnt aight?), he has after all become a household name no less. but howzabout Uncle 'K' ? have you heard of him?

Anyone?

Well, we had the misfortune of coming in contact with Uncle 'K' tonite and we're all regretting it already.

Both the kiddoes had their own plans for the day but were back in the roost by maghrib. and since AI was returning to lendu tomorrow it was time for our customary 'makan luar'. so with nandos on our minds, we made our way to sacc not knowing that it would be overcrowded due to some sort of promotional event. i had an inkling it was going to be hardgoing when we had problems finding a parking space so the nightmarish waiting line at nandos didnt really come as a total surprise.

Undecided we just stood there.. we were at secret recipe only recently and asiari can sometimes be a bit too bland so it was a toss between the nachos place or the kopitiam place. and since AH was as hungry as a horse (not really la but its fun pulling her leg eheh), we made our way to the kopitiam because it would have a bigger variety of choices.

Hmmphh. if only we knew what we were in for.

Uncle 'K' kopitiam is where dave deli used to be. and while we were waiting for someone, anyone, to realise we were seated and ready to order, i had the sneaking suspicion that it was actually a 'mamak' shop in disguise.

Gawd the service was horrendous. the waitresses were too busy being busy and nobody wanted to catch our eyes let alone smile!! tau la customer ramai but you're in the service industry and it comes with the territory babes... havent you heard of 'service with a smile'? nobody kept track of the comings & goings of the customers and people were being served suke2 hati je, which would have been tolerable if the place was really teeming with people tapi walaupun ramai, the crowd was manageable. yes business was brisk but not completely out of control.

Which is why i cannot understand nor comprehend the total chaos.

The wait was long, the food was lousy, the service abysmal. in fact it was the most unsatisfying RM100+ meal we'd had for a very long time.

Thank you Uncle 'K', you certainly wouldnt be seeing the likes of us again. and maybe you really should do away with the kopitiam facade and just be yourself.

Cut off

.. from the world.

Argghh.

Something is wrong with the internet connection... with the one at home.

Something's very very wrong.

Its been 2 days now.

Aaarrrrrgghhhh.

Surprise!!

.. my lil gal turned 16 today and i hope she liked her birthday 'present' ;)

AH has always been a rather straightforward person so when i asked her what it was that she wanted for her birthday, the cheeky lil smartass replied "nak asyraf bole?". haish, now how on earth was i going to do that? conjure up her bf from thin air complete with ribbons? hehehe a magician i certainly wasnt so we had to settle for the next best thing.... have him over for the day.
And thats exactly what he did. AZ was extremely sporting about the whole thing and made himself available for his gf... even though it also meant being 'bullied' in the bargain (by me & mak heheh)!!!! thanks a whole bunch dear, you certainly made AH's 16th birthday a memorable one. she went completely gaga over the gorgeous green tea ice-cream cake, among other things ;)

Yup she's a big girl now (but hey masih underage ok so rules still apply, except maybe not so strict la).

HAPPY SWEET SIXTEEN my darling... wishing you a blessed lifetime ahead!!

Today's the day I've waited for
Because you're not a baby anymore
You've turned into the prettiest girl I've ever seen
Happy birthday sweet sixteen

What happened to that funny face
My little tomboy now wears satin and lace
I can't believe my eyes you're a teenage dream
Happy birthday sweet sixteen
(a real oldie by Neil Sedaka. its sooo old that the young people probably never even heard of it hehehe)

Oh and not to be outdone, i too had a surprise waiting for me at day's end. AI called out of the blue and said he'd be home before midnite... something about classes being cancelled. YAY!! terubat rindu :)

And just for the record our 'cikgu' is doing quite well in kulim and is relieved he got thru his 1st observation without too much 'bloodshed' eheh..way to go AF!!

Israk Mikraj

... by maghrib, it will be israk mikraj again and time to commemorate our beloved prophet's journey & ascension to the heavens.

When we mention israk mikraj to the kids they seem to view it almost like a fairy tale (they also treat stories of their parents childhood the same way but thats beside the point eheh). i'm sure they're not taking our prophet lightly but maybe because it happened so long ago and in such an incredible way. which is rather unfortunate because by doing so they miss the significance of the event.

Maybe we shouldnt approach the subject in the usual manner by reciting the event per se. maybe we should spark their interest by injecting a little bit of science into it.

Quoting from a forum:

Apa yang perlu dan penting sekali bagi umat Islam perpanjangkan kisah realiti ini ialah pengaplikasiannya dan pengadaptasian pengetahuan hasil anugerah terhadap Nabi SAW ini dalam aspek sains dan teknologi, sains angkasa, kosmologi dan sebagainya yang akhirnya boleh menyumbang kepada kemajuan tamadun Manusia. Sekadar menyebut beberapa contoh sahaja sebagaimana di bawah.

Burak - adalah suatu perlambangan kenderaan terpantas meneroka angkasa lepas. Orang Barat menggunakan kenderaan angkasa untuk meneroka planet Marikh contohnya, mengambi masa beberapa tahun untuk pergi dan kembali.

Masa - masa di sisi Tuhan adalah panjang berbanding masa dunia. Rasulullah SAW meneroka 7 lapisan langit hingga menemui Tuhannya dalam masa satu malam sahaja.

Alam - adalah 'ma siwallah-apa atau sesuatu selain Allah keluasannya tidak terkira. ' ... ketika baginda melihat dengan mata batin dari sidrat al-muntaha ke alam ini. (Husein Haikal, 1989, hlm.157). Hal ini sudah pasti pada masa itu boleh melihat keseluruhan bumi ini yang bulat bentuknya.

Aspek-aspek sains dan teknologi - serta keilmuan lain seperti aspek perubatan, kisah-kisah masa depan, hirarki sesebuah kerajaan dan sebagainya

Cukuplah sekadar membayangkan beberapa contoh sahaja panduan ketamadunan hasil dari reality peristiwa israk dan mikraj ini kepada kemajuan ilmu serta sains dan teknologi. Sebenarnya banyak lagi panduan ketamadunan yang boleh diambil dari kisah israk dan mikraj ini dalam banyak aspek ilmu pengetahuan. Kalau kita meneliti banyak pembikinan filem Hollywood sebagai contoh lain, sebenarnya jika diselidiki akan menyerlahkan suatu pengadaptasian dari kisah israk dan mikraj ini. Orang Barat juga begitu maju dalam bidang sains angkasa, sedangkan cetusan mengenai sains angkasa dan penerokaan angkasa lepas itu telah dicetuskan sedemikian lama oleh baginda SAW melalui peristiwa Israk dan Mikraj.

Sebagai kesimpulannya peristiwa Israk Mikraj adalah suatu kejadian yang benar-benar berlaku dalam sejarah kehidupan Nabi SAW yang menjadi suatu anugerah kebesaran baginda SAW sebagai kekasih Allah dan nabi Akhir zaman. Peristiwa ini banyak mendatangkan kesan kepada kehidupan beribadat, bermasyarakat dan kehidupan keilmuan umat Islam dan manusia keseluruhannya.

Dalam kehidupan beribadat, Solat contohnya, adalah ibadat terpenting yang diterima oleh baginda SAW secara terus dari Allah SWT. Dalam kehidupan bermasyarakat pula, segala peristiwa yang disaksikan oleh Nabi SAW mengenai keburukan mengumpat, riba, perbuatan zina dan sebagainya adalah mampu membentuk masyarakat berperadaban dan berharmoni. Akhir sekali peristiwa ini banyak mencetuskan dan membuka jalan kearah penerokaan pelbagai ilmu sains dan teknologi seperti kemajuan sains angkasa dan seterusnya menjadi panduan kepada ketamadunan manusia.

Wallahu a'lam

----------------------------------------------------------

... and by mid-night tonite, my sweet sentimental baby will be turning 16!! gawd where did the time go? dah besar rupanya dara mama ni ek ;)

Ooh and to the thousands of chelsea fans (go ballack go hikhik) who'll be thronging the shah alam stadium tonite, do take a minute to reflect on the myriad of experiences that our prophet (saw) went through that memorable night so many many years ago.

Semoga kita sama-sama mendapat berkat & rahmat yang berterusan dariNYA, insyallah.

Tertinggal boat

Sheesh, how could i have not realised it sooner?

Its almost august and for me it usually means getting myself ready for the shah alam 10k run. for the past couple of years september's the time that mbsa would usually be putting up the event (maybe even late august bcos of ramadhan)... or so i thought but it sure looks like i've been proven wrong!!

Shit-e!!

Damn!!

I checked at the pacesetters events calender and theres no shah alam 10k listed!! correct me if i'm wrong but looks like they're only focussing on the adidas KOTR this year. and i thought it was just another race....

Damn!

Double damn!!

I should've checked sooner. why didnt i check sooner? why? and the closing date for entries was the 25th of july!!!! that was just 3 days ago... just 3 days!! alaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

(can i start crying now?)

Dah la i've gotten FAT... now any motivation that i might have dah gone up in smoke. tahun ni betul2 slack about my running, in fact almost non-existent and i'm paying dearly for it. my brains must've also turned to mush lately bcos i completely failed to make the connection - takkan mbsa nak put up 2 major events back to back kan, bukannya diorang tu rajin sangat pun kan.

I do know it takes a lot of effort organising this sorta thing.... tapi saja tak nak acknowledge sebab tengah frust sangat sangat sangat :(

I have to get out and run today.

I just hafta!!

Sayang oh sayang

I'm here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And I dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight its only you and me
(Here without you - 3 doors down)

Flicking through my cookbook, i smile as i hear them playing this song at yahoo music. it instantly reminds me of my sweet sentimental AH.... to think that she's still missing her bf even though they get to meet almost everyday! heh and even with webcam! nampak je cool tapi ehem, whats with the tissues darling? kalau tak dapat jumpa agaknye bengkak je la mata tu ek!!

Teringat pulak masa zaman AF dulu. i remember us snickering to his whispered phone conversations "sayang sayang sayang? sayang sayang sayang!!" (translated it means "u sayang i? i sayang u!")

Hehehe... macam2 la bebudak ni :)

Abe's off to JB tomorrow on a day trip and going to klcc to pick up his avis rented car was a horror. tak suka la bila these guys that we love start being grumpy!! asyik moyok je nak cakap pun macam malas and after a while it gets tiring sebab nak tolong pun tak tau camane kan. ntah pape la yang ruffle their feathers and all we can do is pretend that everything is ok.. buat selamba pok pek sana pok pek sini usik sana usik sini. which actually works jugak la after a while tapi letih la nak pujuk2 ni... especially when it isnt our fault pun in the first place.

Tapi bila dah sayang nak buat camane kan?

Sayang sayang sayang!!

Tinkering about

Been at the pc most of the day (mata pun naik berbinar dah ni) updating my blogs and generally tinkering about.

Put up a new one to house my recipes and toyed with the idea of changing templates for the others. luckily for me sanity returned and i just left well alone (how could i have forgotten the horror of the lost widgets so easily?).

Ooh but i did find a new problem though. the links to the blog archive dont seem to be working. if i click at the years 2005, 2006 and 2007 all i get are blank pages. hmmm.. i need time to figure this one out or probably what would be more realistic is... i need HELP!!! dont think i'll ever figure it out on my own eheh.

Anyway i can still read the old posts if i want to but via the slooooow way i.e. by clicking at 'older posts'.

If only html made more sense to me.

AF - probably having his hands full juggling between classes and eva eheheh but its ok i guess bcos where he is concern, no news usually mean good news.
AI - might be coming home next weekend to recharge. seems that he's going through a break-up. you gotta be strong sayang mama, no ones worth wrecking your body & soul over. just hang in there k, the right one will come along insyallah.
AH - is pretty impressed by the soccer prowess of her 'hotstup' bf. she's a happy gal alright but a rather tired one (dah terlena pun.. and with her specs on tsk tsk!).

Comel

Oooooh... i'm so gonna get it from AH but what the heck hehehe.

I was clearing up my messy desktop, rearranging icons and updating folders, when i came across a couple of AH's pics. nak wat camane kan dah ada tu tenguk je la *wink wink*


Syhhhhhh.... diam2 tau dia marah sangat kaco bf dia but you know me memang kaki mengusik :)

And why am i so chummy with this one? mainly bcos he's in the unique position of being not only AH's bf but also AI's friend. i dunno, once they fall into the category of friends to my boys they sorta become macam anak2 jugak so cepat je mesra... tapi kesian gak la sebab selalu kena 'buli' ;)

Clearing cobwebs

Heh time to close up some of my old unused email accounts. menyemak je bukannye pakai pun.

But what i didnt realise was its not that simple to close an account; compared to creating one that is. kalau nak create senang je just follow the step-by-step instructions tapi kalau nak tutup, kena meraba2 sendiri or get some help from 'help' (obviously lol).

It wasnt necessary pun to close unused accounts bior je la kan tapi semak otak la dibuatnye so, raba meraba rupanye ada kat edit service.

i.e. click setting>>account tab>>google account>>edit service>>delete gmail/close account

Hah... puas. tapi harap2 tak la effect pulak yang lain, mana la tau kan.

Sarat

... hari yang sarat dengan peristiwa.

Awal2 lagi i checked cik Abe's weekend schedule and confirmed that he had a golf game lined up this morning. that would mean him lepak-ing with his buddies from 7am till around 3pm. that would also mean i myself would be free to lepak if i choose to.

So since EXSAS was having their annual bowling tournament today it was the sunway megalanes for me. not to bowl (semenjak my shoulder problems dulu dah give up) but to cheer my mates on. batch spm '78 was going to be in the thick of things, right where the action would be!! hehehe tak kira la boleh main ke tak janji ada wakil. and since the guys were taking the trouble to play (walaupun setahun sekali je pegang bowling ball tu) takkan kita tak pegi support kot.

No we didnt win.... wasnt even in top 10.... but the guys were great sports. way to go wer, wan husni, wabswa & nor!!!!! it was fun rah rah rah-ing for yall and i would do it again in a heartbeat.

Oh and i had with me not 1 but 3 bodyguards!!

Come to think of it, maybe AH's not really bodyguard material tapi kira ok la tu (bodyguard semut bole la kan hik hik). i dont usually attend any of the EXSAS meets without someone in tow. bukan apa, especially when the hubs was away in turkmenistan risau gak la orang kata kita ni macam terlepas bebas. nak kena jaga la jugak his reputasi sebagai suami kan.

AH plak dengan bijaknye telah meng'optimise'kan the situation & telah mengheret her bf (and his bro) along. so while i was lepak-ing with my friends, she lepak-ed with hers... win-win both ways :)

Lepas tu since the boys were free kitorang pun 'kidnapped' them all the way home!!! oh pls nothing sinister here... just that the battery to AH's laptop was acting up and she wanted her bf to have a look. one thing let to another and before we knew it the boys stayed for dinner and had jemaah maghrib with AH's abah.

Heheh... talk about 'bonding' eh?!!

Another of life's surprises namun perjalanan masih jauh. we'll wait and see :)

*sigh* rindu la pulak kat AF & AI.

(AH confessed it was truly a touching experience to be praying together in jemaah... hmmm).


Workout Log
AM/Dataran Shah Alam - 50 mins moderate aerobics

Bersangka baik

... i have always believed in it and always will.

Bersangka baik in God's will, His infinite Wisdom and Benevolence. then it all becomes so much simpler and less stressful.

- if you're coveting that lucrative post but dont think you'll make the cut - berusaha & bersangka baik la, if its the best for you the job will be yours. if it turns out otherwise, redha je la maybe it would've turned you into a rich snob.

- if you're enjoying a good relationship but dont think it'll last the long haul - stick with it & bersangka baik la, if he's the best one for you jodoh tu tak ke mane. if it turns out otherwise, redha sebab who knows maybe he could've turned into a wife-beater.

The list goes on.

And try not to be too ready to believe the worse. humanity needs a second chance. its a cold & lonely existence when we're always suspecting the worse from everyone and everything.

Life has to be lived to fullest, berwaspada tapi jangan takut pada bayang2. just hold on to the belief that whatever happens, God knows best.

Oh and today walaupun penat tapi tetap puas. setelah seharian berpusing2 di low yat bersama AF & frens, janji pada AH tertunai la sudah - she's finally the esctatic owner of a brand new laptop!!!! asus something or other the specs of which telah membuatkan abang2 dia kecor liur dan jeles giler hehehe.

Sorry it took us soooooooo long darling (dah berselang purnama selepas pmr) and thank you for being soooooo patient.

We love you babe and enjoyz the lappy onkes hehe :)

A student of life

... become one and you'll see growth til the very end.

Its sad that we usually need something disastrous to happen before we take stock of what we're doing or where we're at.

Why?

I guess because its so much easier not to change. we just keep on doing whatever it is that we're doing until we hit a brick wall.

Quoting Andrew Matthews (he says it in such a simple & effective way) :

The only time most of us ever learn anything is when we get hit over the back of the head!

Take our health for example. When do we change diets & start exercising? When our body is falling apart - when the doctor says: "If you dont change your life style, you'll kill yourself!". Suddenly we're motivated.

In relationships - when do we usually tell each other how much we care? When the marriage is falling apart, when the family is falling apart!

In school - when do we finally knuckle down and study? When we're about to fail.

In business - when do we try new ideas and make the tough decisions? When we cant pay our bills. When do we finally learn about customer service? After the customers have left.

When do we usually pray? When our life is falling apart, "Dear Lord, i know i havent spoken to you since the last time the yoghurt hit the fan..."

We learn our biggest lessons when things get rough. When have you made the most important decisions in your life? When you were on your knees - after disasters, after knock-backs, when you've been kicked in the head. Thats when we say to ourselves: "I'm sick of being broke, sick of being kicked around. I'm tired of being mediocre. I'm going to do something". Success we celebrate, but we dont learn too much. Failure hurts and thats when we get educated. In retrospect, we usually notice 'disasters' were turning points.

Effective people (now thats who we want to be la heheh) dont go looking for problems, but when they get smacked in the mouth, they ask themselves: "How do i need to change what i'm thinking and what i'm doing? How can i be better than i am now?" Losers ignore all the warning signs. When the roof falls in they ask: "Why does everything happen to me?"

We are creatures of habit. We keep doing what we are doing until we are forced to change. So is life a series of painful 'disasters'? Not necessarily. The universe is always nudging us with gentle signals. When we ignore the signals, it nudges us with a sledgehammer.

Growth is most painful when we resist it.

In a nutshell
We are not here to be punished. We are here to be EDUCATED. Every event has the potential to transform us, and disasters have the greatest potential to change our thinking. Act as if every event has a purpose and your life WILL have a purpose. Figure out why (muhasabah la ni) you needed an experience, conquer it, and you wont need it again.

Oh my!!

I just never learn :(

Everytime i feel adventurous and change my template, i buy myself a truckload of new problems.

*sigh*

Tu la, takde penyakit cari penyakit. tapi... ceria sungguh la template baru ni. something that i stumbled upon by chance, and being sumtimes irrepressibly impulsive i just took it on tanpa berfikir panjang.

Adeh.

Now i lost mah widgets yall, along with it some of mah ole links.

*sigh*

Itu la dia RK, the unpredictably predictable person. huh? or is it the predictably unpredictable person? heish, pape je la ;)

Sumtimes she surprises even herself.

(tapi memang ceria sungguh blog ku kini hehehe.... but RED on a daily basis??!!! we'll see)

Strong emotions

.. can be destructive but when harnessed properly can generate a world of good.

Eh bunyi macam something from x-men plak ek. mutants learning to control and utilise their powers to their best advantage. tersangat la sci-fi je bunyinya..... tapi sebenarnya kita pun camtu gak skit2. strong feelings and emotions usually arise from a deep concern over the things we care about. kalau kita tak ambil peduli kita biarkan aje kan. and to be passionate about something is to be alive.

Really?

Yes, really.

Kalau kita terlalu 'tak kisah' semuanya akan menjadi hambar, nothing to really push us out of our comfort zones. terlalu comfortable nanti jadi macam kucing kena kasi plak.

So, if you're angry about something or jealous about something... its not necessarily a bad thing. in fact i read somewhere that "to not feel entirely sure of 'possessing' someone or something is what keeps desire alive". you just hafta teach yourself a little restrain, a little balance so that the strong feelings doesnt cloud your mind or your judgement. its a skill worth cultivating, even if it takes your whole lifetime. i'm still at it myself -_-

I was discussing it with the kids the other day. its normal to have jealous bfs & gfs... romantic jealousy is a common emotion when you love someone. freud said something like " if a person doesnt experience jealousy when an important relationship is threatened, something is not altogether right. it is akin to not feeling grief when someone you care deeply about dies. such a response most probably means that the person is working hard to supress jealousy and hiding it from self and others".

Also "jealousy is motivated by the need to protect a valued relationship".

Jadi bagus la kan when a bf or gf jeles sebab it only means they place a certain value to the relationship. all they want to do is to protect it from potential threat usually in the form of other people. tapi i understand, sikit2 takpe, yang tak larat tu is when it gets disturbingly out of hand sampai rasa lemas & rimas. we've all experienced jealousy at some point in our lives but its especially strong with young people. mungkin kerana orang muda masih kurang pengalaman dalam menangani masalah kehidupan terutama yang berkisar sekitar hati & perasaan.

Whatever the cause may be, we cant let jealousy consume us. it can get out of hand and many a case of violent abuse finds its roots in jealousy. how can we hurt the very people we profess to love? so, take a step back, reexamine our reaction and reestablish our feelings of love & affection. apapun dalam hidup kita ni, biarlah berpada-pada.

Its all about coping, about finding a way that works best for us. talking things out usually works tapi feelings must first be brought under control... kalau idak akhirnya kelahi jugak.

Dont let jealousy kill the love that's been tended to so carefully. rugi..... especially when its groundless.

Timely

God loves us.... HE never gives up on us and keeps sending timely reminders. its up to us whether to seize it or ignore it.

Yesterday was another one of those instances. Abe's rude awakening totally blindsided him... out of nowhere (or it seems that way tapi sebenarnya the signs were there but we just didnt see it, dumb blind fools that we are) the belly that he took for granted became the focus of his life. what if something was really really wrong with it?

So things turned out ok and now he feels he's been given a 2nd chance. alhamdulillah, it was a great opportunity to sit back and reconsider options.

Now he's excited about taking charge and caring for his body again, something he should've been doing but was oh, waylaid somehow (arent we all?). and he's not the only who's excited because i am too. rugi orang yang tak ambil iqtibal daripada pengalaman orang lain. dah tua2 ni macam2 can go wrong and whatever happened to him can so easily happen to me.

But i also know that we need to keep this momentum going.... because otherwise it would slowly fizzle off like that partly finished can of sprite you leave on the table. flat, unexciting and undesirable (nobody likes a flat fizzy).

Gotta start with a return to better eating habits. Abe's penchant for supper was never a good thing and that's the first thing to go.

No suppers.

At least not the heavy kind that he adores. the ones that come in the form of a full blown maggi goreng complete with perencah udang/daging/ayam/sayur or lempeng eaten with freshly made sambal mackerel. all this after dinner & dessert of course. maklum la the only time he gets to eat homecook meals is after he comes back from a hard days work. which usually means after the sun goes down.

Makan malam especially well into the nite puts a heavy strain on the body. our system needs to rest so we need to taper off slowly. tapi ni terbalik pulak, we're on full throttle.

Ok next will be the type of food to be made available. ni susah la sikit. Abe's favourite dishes involve frying, frying and more frying. to make this work he needs a mind shift and start enjoying soups, grilled and steamed stuff.

Hmmmmmm... rasanya macam gelap je masa depan sebab i've tried this many many times before and so far have never been successful, but who knows ya? theres a time for everything.... maybe this time the timing is right, kot terbuka pulak minda cik Abe kite ni.

Then its allevating the fitness level. hmmmmm, i have to somehow convince the man swinging that club every weekend is not enough, and being carted around in that buggy isnt the same as walking the greens and lugging his golfbag around on his own steam. i will also have to sell him the idea that working out at the gym and pounding the pavements with me will not only result in a fitter body but will also improve his golfing stamina.

Not an easy task... but i'm trying to ride on this wave of awareness i sense in him and hope that the momentum will carry it thru.

As for me, its also time to take charge and deal with these additional kgs seriously. i'm starting to be really gooooood at making excuses these days.

No more.

Thank you lord.

My dahleeeng

... isnt well. nothing that could be pinpointed but he's not feeling 100%.

Abe's turkmenistan posting had turned him into a much greater eater than he already was. the lack of food that he favoured and the horror of having to cook his own meals had traumatized him somewhat. now he doesnt let anything go to waste and voraciously devours everything that gets into his path.... sedap je semua!!

Anyway, with all that eating under his belt (ugh, dah tak boleh nak belt up his pants pun heheh), he's tummy has doubled in size!! gawd, buncit and tersangat la tegang. and of course he has developed symptons similar to that of a pregnant woman hehehe... sakit pinggang and extreme discomfort due to his extended belly.

But after a while, the discomfort increased to such a level that started us into thinking, hey maybe its more than overeating.... maybe it wasnt just the extra food but something else, something more sinister.

A preliminary check-up led him to a referral to sjmc, where he ended up doing both an endoscopy (oral invasion) and a colonoscopy (anal invasion), as well as an ultra sound thrown in for good measure. you know, stuff that needed done to see whats going on inside that belly of his.

The nite prior to the procedures, Abe had to ingest quite a substantial amount of prescribed fluid to ensure that his 'internal plumbing' is cleared of all waste, toxic or otherwise. everything was to be nice and clean. i could just imagine a perky young nurse saying "squeaky clean bowels ready for inspection, doc" lol. oh and let me tell ya, i was pretty darn tempted to abandon my post beside him that nite. you just wouldnt believe the amount of toxic gases that were released into the surrounding atmosphere (gasp GASP.... need i say more?).

Alhamdulillah according to the results this morning, his esophagus, stomach and intestines are fine... no signs of the big C or anything like that (thank god). just a decrease in certain hormones that's causing the slowing down of contractions aiding in digestion. the ultrasound on the other hand, shows a slight swelling of his liver (old story actually), due to too much fatty deposit.

So its meds, lotsa meds... and a change towards a healthier lifestyle (and no Abe, golf is NOT considered as 'working out' keh keh) and hopefully things will be under control.

Just another month

..... to the OLYMPICS, yay!!

08/08/08

Great numbers, especially for the chinese, so its pretty fitting that its being held in beijing.

Oh oh and i believe it has become quite meaningful for AH too.... part of it at least heheh ;)

Staying up

.... till the wee hours.

It always starts with Abe's plan to stay up for something or other... be it the golf masters, or pga tour, or uefa cup, or euro finals. latest is the wimbledon and since it started, its been tennis almost every night, reaching its most feverish pitch last nite, or should i say this morning?!

The thing is he'll be sleeping like a baby halfway thru and i'm the one left blinking away, too caught up in whatever it is that he started to even consider getting some shut-eye!!

I was the one watching the williams battling it out, blood against blood, sister against sister. frankly its always been venus for me. serena is a little too bulky, a little too graceless and she moves about like a tractor.. me, i like to see a little grace in court when it comes to the ladies.

Same thing with nadal & federer. the dream match as the commentators call it and what does my other half do? he snores thru the exciting returns hehehe..... of course the intermittent waits for the rain to clear up didnt really help but gawd, it was nadal vs federer, hellooo!!! tertido jugak dia ish ish... but it was about 4 in the wee hours till it was finally over. he never could handle late late nites :)

Maybe the spaniard deserve to win.... persistence should be rewarded i guess, but its such a joy to see federer play. the killer combination of strength & grace. only in tennis (and the replays) can you actually get to appreciate the full range of muscle play; controlled power rippling thru the body with each hit.

It makes me wanna go out and get me a toned body myself (a near impossible task but what the heck..... makciks can dream too cant they hehe).

But first *yawn* i've got to get thru the day at least in half functional mode *yawn*

Oooh.. just for the record, i did put in a slow 4k run sunday morning followed by a nice looong stretching session. not much in getting toned la but something is better than nothing ;)

Sakit pinggang

Wheeeeeeeee.... Abe didnt have any golf scheduled and i had him all to myself the whole freakin day :)

Apa lagi, i didnt want to miss the chance and managed to coerce him into jogging with me first thing. pretending not to hear his half-hearted 'sakit pinggang la' excuses, we set out with a stern note from him "dekat je tau... tak nak pegi jauh2".

Alhamdulillah the cool breezy morning must've gotten to him because he relented halfway and took a much further route than first agreed upon; we passed the sec 9 shop lots right up to the concorde intersection, onto pusat seni islam and state mosque, cruised the dividing road between sec 10 & 11, then crossed back over to sec 9.

Maybe we did 3-4km.

Maybe.

But it was my jog against his brisk-walk and at some point or other i had to leave him dawdling somewhere behind since his pace kept getting slower and slower. of course i made my way back to him again and again. unfortunately if i didnt run, i wouldnt sweat and really felt like it wasnt doing me any good otherwise.

Apapun he's on the roads again... yay. before long he'll be back to the slow jog that he had previously progressed to (before he became lay-zeeee and gave up hehe).

Of course after the session the 'sakit pinggang' came back. oh and especially after he downed a heaped helping of nasi dage stacked with daging goreng, sotong and ikan (his own) & half bowl of laksam (mine) at sri TTDI *___*

First weekend without the boys. they should be well settled in by now, at least i hope so. i'm just happy that AI took the lower bunk at my request even tho i know he feels my reasons are the silliest on earth, considering that he's almost 20.. but the upper bunk fills me with nothing but nightmares; 1. he'd accidentally jatuh katil in his sleep 2. he'd accidentally bang his head on the overhead fan (like he did once before). i just cant help it bcos the guy does have a medical history concerning head trauma.

Insyallah, all will be well.

These days AH doesnt seem too desperate to go out. maybe its the webcam, courtesy of her bf. aaaah.... technology ;)


Workout Log
AM : 3-4km jog round the neighbourhood

Rejab

Rejab is back.... its time to prepare the body & soul for more vigorous days ahead.

The wildness in my heart needs taming and the pounds on my body needs shedding soooo, its indeed a timely reminder.

Lord, give me the will to stay committed.


AF has found a rented house suited to his immediate needs and will be starting his practical next week. all he needs is more funds.
AI is safely back in lendu but i know its going to be sometime before he's settled down enough to be fully functional. long breaks can actually weaken resolve.
AH is finding out love can be both simple & complicated at the same time. fairytales dont exist and while awareness is better than oblivion, it can be quite painful.

Sick

AH's down with flu and i'm having this familiar sick feeling at the pit of my stomach.

Its that time again...... by thursday nite both my boys will be back in college.

*sigh*

Long semester breaks wreck havoc with my feelings because i'm lulled into this blissful state when all my 'babies' are home and then wham!! time's up and i lose them all over again.

Rindu. nasib baik la i still have AH with me.... for now.

Kg Kundang

Never heard of the place prior to the 'bertunang' ceremony thus the blurrness & confusion.

Abg J didnt really explain much about the whereabouts of kg kundang, most probably because having a wife from banting didnt make him a stranger to the area. i guess it never occured to him that the majority of us tagging along wasnt at all familiar with the kampungs of selangor.

We initially thought it was in klang.... then we heard it was in banting... and we finally realised it was even further up the morib area!! yikes it was so much further than we'd earlier anticipated and the journey itself took us about an hour and a half, travelling made painfully slow by the convoy of almost 10 cars. abg J must've been daydreaming when he said it would probably take 45 minutes tsk tsk. gedebuk gedebak we overshot the agreed time by almost 2 hours!! nasib baik orang sebelah sana baik2 belaka :)

Gawd if an engagement was this grand, involving a rombongan cik kiah of this magnitude, macamane la wedding tu esok2 ek?!!

Apa2pun my nephew sure looked like a cat who got all the cream :) why? he's managed to ikat the girl that he wants obviously heheh.... and also because the occasion was heavily sponsored by the parents!! the lucky dude. orang muda baru nak mulakan hidup, nasib baik ada understanding & supportive parents.

My dear dear jireen & sara... CONGRATULATIONS!!

Oooh and wonder of wonders, turns out its the same kampung as the grandma of AH's bf and to make matters even more coincidental, he & his family were there visiting at the same time. talk about fate & coincidence?!

Okee, now its time to settle down and wait for the euro finals -__- hey wheres my nachos ?

Oo Oooooh

AF's coming home tonite and we've only just realised we completely forgot about downloading his stuff from the net!!! he has this bit-torrent thing running and 2 weeks would have meant a lot of downloads.

Ooooh, he's gonna be so freakin' mad.

Should i put the blame on the erratic & unreliable broadband connection? or pretend selangor dilanda massive power shortage? ish susah la asyik terlupa ni. tapi nak wat camane kan, dia bukannya nak tinggalkan kitorang his password (alasaaaaan hik hik... macam la tak leh call dia kan). tu laaa nak jaga sangat privacy password sana password sini kan dah susah!!!

Yup, AI and me, we're both kecut perut now... AI bcos they share the same room (AF's laptop is just an arm's length away) and me bcos i'm generally the caretaker of everything. not that he'll do anything pun, with all his gruff & huff he's actually a pussycat. its just that he was depending on us to help out and we didnt. guilty sebenarnya bukan apa. lets hope the trip went REALLY well and he's mellow enuff not to be too affected.

AF mesti serabut giler, balik je malam ni dah nak kena siap2 untuk terus balik ke maktab. what with his 3 month practicum kat kulim, nak kena cari bilik sewa lagi. problem is when he's in a tizzy, mama dia pun turut la kelamkabut nk siapkan barang2 dia. hai, sabor je la.

And what is it with the kiddoes and their exes? si AF ni has an ex who still cares for him and she doesnt hide the fact, even from me. he's a little bit uncomfortable with the situation but since they're coursemates he's had to deal with it. me, i keep an open mind and i'm ok with any of my children's friends. orang berbudi kita berbahasa and she's friendly enough to send me sms's off and on. now the interesting thing is, she's also part of the sarawak gang!! weeeell, 2 weeks together..... seronok jugak la nak tau berita terkini dari bumi kenyalang.

No sayang... ma tak nak apa2 from sarawak thanks. just get ur ass back here in one piece -_-

Hati & perasaan.

I hate conflict. if i cant avoid it, i run from it.

Now that i've put on more years it seems to be getting worse not better. thankfully my life's quite problem free right now so real life conflict is almost non-existent (the relentless/ heartbreaking kind... yg kecik2 tu biasa laa). i say its bad because i find myself slowly leaving the room the moment a movie starts moving from an 'ok' phase to a more dramatic one.

Tembak2 tikam2 bunuh2 takpe.... even hantu, jembalang, ju onn type horror pun ok lagi. that kind of drama doesnt affect me. in fact syok je duduk dalam gelap berpeluk2 bawah selimut dengan bebudak tu. what i cant stand is emotional drama, the kind that plays with your feelings and screws with your head. especially when it deals with betrayal.

I dunno... i guess we're at our most vulnerable as children. i've long since moved on from the heartbreak i experienced coming from a broken family and thank god i've even been blessed with a good loving family of my own. its just that somehow deep inside, whenever theres any sign of conflict, i still feel the resounding echoes of loneliness & uncertainty of my childhood. its a disturbing, uncomfortable, sometimes unbearable feeling.

I'm not really an emotional person. i dont cry at movies or weddings (well not normally la heheh)... i just hate getting my feathers ruffled i guess. not in that way.

My heart goes out to those kids who have to deal with divorce in the family. however amicable the situation, life can never really be the same for them. so if you have a storm brewing in your marriage try weathering it out first before taking any drastic steps. theres no quick fix when it comes to love and loved ones.

My daughter's having some problems with the past too, but of a different kind. her bf, unfortunately, seems to be fixated on her ex. i guess young people can get insecure sumtimes but its such a waste of time & emotion sebenarnya. yes, we've all been there.. who hasnt been plagued by thoughts of the 'other' person? but to keep bringing him up isnt such a great idea. better to have it all out once and for all, and move on. after all the past is past, digging it up would only be hurtful and its not like we can really change anything. kan lagi baik kalau focus je on making each other deliriously happy :)

I like the guy and i somehow wish he'd realise he's actually letting the ex take centre stage again when its obvious the ex has been out of the picture for quite awhile now. from what i see, AH has moved on and is now pretty much into him, not the ex. if only he can see that too.

Young love..... like i said before, kita tunggu & lihat.

Workout Log.
PM aerobics - 35 mins/ med pace/suk clubhouse.
PM run - slow jog/ 3x round the suk's football field.

He's home

.. my darling is back from visiting the turkmen :)

Life's more fun when theres someone to kacau again, not to mention scratch, bite, squeeze and tickle at my leisure & pleasure.

Heh.

Heheh.

AF's now in miri..... he seems to be enjoying his great sarawak adventure in more ways than one!!
AI's getting cuak and more cuak by the minute. will he be getting the car before the sem reopens... or not?!!
AH's learning about life, love....... and skating ;)

And who would have thought i'd be meeting her bf's mom today eheh.

Jodoh

Makngah can now tarik nafas selega-lega mungkin.... now that her only daughter is safely married to a guy whom no one should really have anything to grouse about.

And whats there to complaint anyway? hasnt everyone been so bising that she's getting on in her years and that she shouldnt be so picky? wasnt everyone so concerned that she'd end up and old maid? and anyway jodoh kan ditangan tuhan kan? the fact that he's as old as my uncle shouldnt really be a factor now should it?

Can never please everyone..... ever. yang penting yang empunya badan know what they're doing bcos in the end they're the ones facing the consequences good or bad.

For me even though its my cousin's wedding, i had to go as a 'guest'. one would expect a close family member to put up at least an overnite stay just to help out... but mak wasnt up to travelling what more spending the nite (i know she was also thinking of her cats even tho she wasnt saying) so it had to be a daytrip. in the end it was just the 3 of us making our way to sri manjong.

AH had already bawled her eyes out the previous nite when she first heard about the trip and realised she had to go.... this was one occasion she couldnt wriggle her way out of. she'd been planning to spend the day with her bf since it's his 20th birthday. well it cant be helped darling.... some decisions have to be followed however painful.

I was actually having my own problems to deal with. walaupun pelik tapi i wasnt too sure about the way back!!! yup memang benar. being a true soldier's daughter where merantau was the name of the game, i didnt really get that many a chance to balik kampung, either kuala pilah nor sitiawan. and having divorced parents just made it worse.... i didnt have any roots. to me shah alam is my kampung bcos its where my heart is. so balik kampung really really is a rare occurence for me and my family.

As far as i can remember i had driven back on my own only once and that was many many years ago... so it's not a wonder why i was more than cuak about the idea. but with directions that i had googled and contact numbers on standby i knew i'd be ok laa, paling2 pun instead of the usual 3 hrs i'd take longer. and having AI beside me radiating trust & support was indeed a big help (AH on the other hand was lost in her own world, dozing off and on, in the backseat lol).

Thank god that apart from a missed junction (or three haha) we made it there in good time. turns out finding the dewan was more of a hassle than the drive down...... dah lama sangat tak balik i just couldnt figure the place out.... everything's so different!!!! i guess thats progress for ya :)

Anyway alhamdulillah semuanya selamat.

SELAMAT PENGANTIN BARU TUTI & CIKGU..... semoga dirahmatiNYA dunia akhirat.

Slow day.

As usual abg J pulled another last minute arrangement on us 'younger siblings'.

Just the one call and we're all expected to make room for his plans. admittedly its an occasion that would benefit all..... having yassin recital ramai2 on malam jumaat pulak tu insyallah membawa seribu satu rahmat & berkat.

But a little bit of planning beforehand would've made it so much easier for everyone especially since its potluck and done at mek's.

As it is, i ended up going alone. with Abe away and AF in sarawak, theres only AI but he had already made prior arrangements with his old friends and it just wasnt fair to expect him to suddenly cancel. mak was already hot on his heels trying to emotionally blackmail him into not going but i had no choice but to stand firm; he had already promised his friends. of course family came first but not when its done this way.. with such blatant disregard to other people's time and planning. must have a little more consideration for other people la after all it IS a weekday.

AH had to stay home and temankan her opah even though she was kinda looking forward to meeting up with her cousins.

It was havoc as usual (what do you expect when you squeeze in 2-3 generation of people in a teeny weeny apartment lol) and again Abe was sorely missed especially by his mom. he's the only son who frequently leaves the 'nest' and have this long stints abroad. mek worries about her jetsetting ajis but fact is he's also the one she depends on for emotional support. mek doesnt really have daughters she can depend on (just lots of DILs including moi) so i guess abe fits the bill because he's more metrosexual than the rest of his brothers. hehehe memang he's very in tune with his feminine side pun and i have those pics in pd to prove it hikhik (he was one of them who had to dress up in drag during a particular team building session).

Came home to a sad & disturbed AH..... theres a lil storm brewing up in her corner of the world. she & her bf will have to iron things out as best they can, they're still so young.

Being in love is the easy part. there has to be a certain willingness to commit for it to grow stronger.

Kita tunggu dan lihat.


Workout Log
AM run - 4k/tasik

Sangap

Bored out of my skull.

Takde orang sebelah nak kaco. ada anak2 pun semuanya preoccupied with their respective 'sweethearts'.... maklum la orang dah beso panjang, bukannya nak layan sangat kita ni kan.

sigh.

I miss you darling.

Oooh yess.... guess what i was doing before this soul deadening sangap descended upon me again? i did nico's 'hair'. hehehehe the poor cat is now sporting a bright orange 'hairdo' (will get pic soon). it was henna time again and now he's ready to set the neighbourhood pussycats a-swooning -__-

Now i wonder if they're done with the texting (not bloody likely but what the heck) ?

"Ooooh ijaaaaaat!!!!! ooooh echaaaaa!!! "


Workout Log
PM aerobics - 30 mins bouncing about on the exercise ball -__-'
(gawd give me the usual hard thumping aerobics anytime... the kind that makes me sweat rivers).

Perhimpunan

The 2nd perhimpunan for the SUK staff, under the new 'management'.

It was the usual blah blah blah but i'm wondering why hasan ali and some of the excos tak angkat tangan pun masa berikrar. even if its a civil servant's oath diorang tak terikat ke dengan such things? or maybe they have their own ikrar to stand by?

Apa2pun rasa pelek pulak when everyone else dengan serious & bersungguh2nya (tok sah kira la whether they really mean it or its just for show) berikrar, awak sebagai pemimpin berdiri je kat depan as if berkecuali.

It disturbs me. i'm not actively for or against anyone or anything in particular, but somehow the sight of it just disturbs me.

On a brighter note, i managed to squeeze in some huffing & puffing again today and it was goooood. better than yesterday. i could feel the chi flowing & was into the zone :) heheh.. cutting out the jargon, what it means is that i was just enjoying it.

Ooh and glad to say that AF is safely in kucing, while golfman is already in dubai and will be flying out to istanbul soon. so for now AI is the man of the house :)


Workout Log
AM run - 4k
PM aerobics - 30 mins/moderate

Burn

Abe's leaving tonite but he was still out with the birds at dawn to pace the greens. he's a golf nut, enuff said.

I took the oppurtunity to hit the pavement after dropping AH off at the UiTM sports centre. she's starting tennis lessons with her friend mly, which is a good thing because i've always wanted her to move that butt of hers a lil bit more but unfortunately i'll have to miss my fav sunday morning aerobics at the dataran!!!!!

Problem is, the aerobics is scheduled at 7.30 am (which is almost never ever on time but still) and AH's tennis session starts at 8.00 am so theres somewhat of a clash here. unless and until i can come up with some other suitable arrangement, nampak gaya tak beraerobik la den!!

Anyway, i made my way to the tasik yet again (yes i like repetition and am totally devoid of creativity).

After a rather long warm-up (maklum la dah lama tak pekena), i started out counter clockwise to the recomended direction. hajat hati tu nak buat 2 big loops which would roughly amount to 8 km but i sure was fooled by the weather.

There i was huffing & puffing into my 2nd lap when it started to drizzle. huh? i was more than a little surprised..... isnt that the sun thats shining ever so brightly? ni hujan apa lak ni ? (duh, hujan panas la makcik hehehe but i digress). i kept on running while my mind was whirring with options - do i stop, do i continue as planned, do i detour - after all it could turn out to be a false alarm but almost instantly, mendung la pulak. hey i wasnt scared of a little rain tapi i started thinking about AH. she was supposed to finish by 10- 10.30 but surely the rain would affect the timing.

So hendak tak nak kena la buat u turn and i consoled myself 6 km pun jadi laa pada tak buat langsung kan. chicken feed for serious runners tapi for a makcik runner-wannabe-yang-dah-lama-tak-lari like me it was quite an achievement la, semput-semput pun heheh. nak jadi cerita elok into the last 500m or so, the sun shone brightly once again and the drizzle stopped completely.

It went away as suddenly as it came.. and left me tercengang-cengang, undecided on what to do next. since 'malas' pun dah mula timbul i opted for a long cooling down session until it was time to pick up AH.

All in all it was a good start :)

Now if i can only keep the momentum going.


Workout Log
AM run - 6km/tasik

Nico oh nico

My most favourite favourite feline in the whole wide world......

nicolei da gangsta

Apart from the fact that i raised him from a wee lil kitty small enuff to fit into the palm of my hand to this huge garfield wannabe, he also loves me enuff to let me get away with almost anything........ including colouring the fur at the top of his head with henna (he kinda looks like aznil sumtimes hehehe) and dressing him up any way i wanna -________-

Mummy luvs u too u giant furball u !!

Arrghh

UTI is not a dirty word.

But it can be insanely uncomfortable!!!!

Aaarrgh.

Its one of those things the older age group gets to 'enjoy' as they progress further and further into life... you know, the start of that slow downward spiral which you cant really stop even if you wanted to.

Sabor je la.

Oooh and its friday the 13th... muahahahaha *cueing in the scarier than scary music*

Fact is both day (friday) & date (13) is actually considered auspicious by a muslim :)

Music

I have a weakness for it.

And just like the majority of us sharing good ole planet earth, it can so easily influence my mood.. sad songs bring in the melancholy, slow numbers set 'da mood', upbeat ones just make me wanna get up & dance - the urge of which i must sometimes control bearing in mind how awful and scary the sight of an old fart jiggling about might be for some people lmao!!

(but honestly i do so love dancing)

Now it seems that music is also what brought AH & her new beau closer together.

Anyone who knows her know that she and her beloved black guitar are quite inseparable. its the first thing she reaches for when shes stressed out (which is often, school being the war zone it is these days), and if she could, she'd probably lug the thing around with her wherever she goes. maybe it has become more meaningful to her because she's had to go about it the hard way - i.e belajar sendiri. i wasnt predisposed to sending her for formal lessons (i have my own reasons). she's good at it because she wants to be.



So the 'nerdish prefect' has another side to her; she's also a self-taught guitarist, albeit amateur, who has her own acoustic as well as her bro's electric guitar (micro-cube included) at her disposal. oh and since she's slowly coming out of her 'introvert' shell, shes also singing quite openly now (she didnt use to).

And somewhere along the way, she has ended up being a sensei to her bf. yup, a sensei as in sifu/cikgu. kinda cool eh when you consider the deviation from the usual 'guy teach girl' thing?! they have guitar sessions twice a week and i heard progress is quite good. but i'm guessing thats not the only area of progress. fact is, if we frequently meet up with the person we like, we create strong feelings of intimacy - pergaulan memupuk kemesraan memupuk kasih sayang.

Oooh oh, i better keep my eagle eyes on the kiddoes!!!! but just for the record, i like her new bf. he's older, more matured but more importantly, him & me, we've had our 'lil talk and have come to a certain understanding :)

Well enuff about missy echa hanis.

My boys? now those 2 have decided to hole up in their room and i can assure you its an absolute MESS in there and i stay weeell away!!!!!! they surface when their stomachs start grumbling or when they get whiffs of whatever it is thats bubbling on my stove. sheeessh, thats guys for ya. but i guess they deserve to be bums.... results are coming in and AI's back on the DL again. at least the nightmare of last semester didnt repeat itself thank god. upsi's a bit slow in releasing results so AF might still be in suspence when he leaves for sarawak this weekend.

And golfman? come sunday and he'll be leaving for another week in turkmenistan. a couple of short stints before he resumes his duties there and it could mean another year or two of merantau-ing. maybe, possibly, probably... you cant really say for sure with these oil men.

As for me, i sure am NOT looking forward to manning the ship in his absence even tho i know i'll have to anyway.

Hmmmm... AF's flying off in the AM and golfman's flight will be in the PM. adeh, sunyi la nanti!!

Its silver

Weeeeell whadaya know......... its been 25 years already!!!!!!!



And my dearest darling, you're still THE one.

Borrowing heavily from my daughter AH, who seem to be floating in & out of cloud 9 these days... (and yes, she has moved on from the ruins of her first love thank god), seni çok seviyorum Abe.

Looking forward to many many more years to come :)

Crossroads

At my age i've come to lotsa lotsa crossroads... tapi semakin berumur semakin slow nak buat pilihan. bukan tak tau arah tuju, the general direction tu kalau tak tau tau gak lagi memang lebih dari bengap la. just that sumtimes its easier to go with the current flow, walaupun kekadang dah terasa agak menyongsang.

Growth.. will still happen if you allow it

Continuous improvement.. without which you stagnate, obviously ;)

Wisdom.. tersangat covetted tapi also tersangat elusive

Susah la nak jadi warga emas contoh but to become a warga emas haprak is NOT an option, not if you want the kids to make something of their lives. dah la role models yang boleh emulate semakin pupus so whats a parent to do but to at least try.

Passion.. necessary to crawl out of this comfort zone.

Omg and its june already!!!!!!

Again and again

Sheesh, kenapa la kita susah sangat nak belajar dari pengalaman.

The free aerobic session at dataran shah alam has been going on for such a long long time... so much so one would think MBSA would be able to have it smooth and running every sunday morning even with their eyes closed.

Tapi time and time again, loyal warga shah alam are made to stupidly wait, full of uncertainty as to whether the weekly session would still be on or not - sometimes its a mix up with the instructors' schedules and they dont turn up at all, sometimes the instructors turn up in full force and the soundman is missing, sometimes both instructors and technicians are absent.

This time some other organizers were using the same venue and nobody seemed to know anything.

A long wait and eventually a wasted morning.

Maklum la benda free so nak cakap banyak pun susah tapi MBSA sepatutnya ada jugak la a sense of social obligation. kena la professional skit and jangan la treat people like they dont matter. didnt feel like doing the tasik rounds after that so i made my way to the wetmarket instead; AF tengah mengidam nak makan tempe la plak heheh. since i made pasta for AI yesterday so its AF's turn. nothing fancy just crisp fried tempe, eaten while piping hot... setimbun pun boleh habis tapi nape ek, tak pulak jadi 'charming' macam our ex MB?! ;)

Since the man had to do some overtime it was up to me and AH to drop AI off at lendu. thank god we left way before maghrib so there wasnt any tarffic jams on the way back like the last time. it was a breeze.... tapi harap2 tak la kena any speed trap pulak.

Full House

An overcast morning but its great weather for running especially for someone yang start lambat like me.

Skipped the tasik today and took on the shah alam roads - section 9 up to the abah shell station across the main road pass the pusat kesenian islam/masjid negeri, section 11 police station, up the hill road flanked by both seksyen 11 and 12, down towards the kayangan roundabout, across the main roads again back to section 9... probably around 5km kot (nanti kena cek).

Its housework today and after the cooking & cleaning i just lazed about watching free korean/japanese/taiwanese drama @ www.mysoju.com (my latest addiction) until it was time to pick up the man at 4.45pm, KLIA.

Yay, my baby's back... and with all 3 kids home its full house again :)

Workout Log
AM/Run - 5km/neighbourhood/tak perasan the time

Still erratic

I've actually let myself become laaaaaaaay-zzzzeeeeeee.... and when that happens, i also start pigging out like theres no tomorrow (uugghhh)!!

Ada je excuse for not donning my huff n puff gear (which reminds me i need new tops and bottoms.... semua dah beyond lusuh). and its no wonder that i've put on 3 solid kgs since the start of the year (triple uugghhhh)!!!

Golfman's been making the rounds visiting a couple of steel mills in japan and is now in hiroshima (i keep seeing the images of devastation brought about by the atomic horror everytime i see that name). without him around i should have ample time to be out pounding the pavement but we've had ISO audit at the office monday to wednesday and it sure has been a huge drain to my energy (yea yea... lame excuse). on top of that the 2 boys have been having these unscheduled comings & goings (its study leave after all) so all in all its just been a rather serabut week for me (another lame excuse).

Glad to say i got off my butt this morning and went running :)

Its been awhile.


Workout Log
AM/Jog - 4km/35 mins(ciiss.. reeeally slow but its a start)/tasik

Johnny's of Ayer Keroh

AI's vaio crashed on him so the band of 3, being me, AF & AH (golfman main golf la apa lagi) made our merry little way to lendu on a quest to save his puter & its contents.

We ended up in jayajusco air keroh the most part of the day, especially at coffee bean for net access. but i wasnt really complaining sebab terubat la skit rindu kat anak no. 2 yang sokmo sibuk and teramat jarang balik ni :)

Steamboat at johnny's... easier on the pocket than coca but just as yummy!

(AF is missing from the pictures tapi camera man biasa la macam tu kan)

Walaupun agenda utama was to save the puter tapi as usual it was also AI's payback time for being away.... macam2 dia nak makan. there was steamboat for lunch, ice blended entahpape kat coffee bean, pastu tapau cheesecake slices kat secret recipe (even for gf), pastu tapau lagi double cheeseburger kat mcD (also termasuk gf)..... ooh and not forgetting his supply of chocolates, also huge slabs of jusco pizza for his roommates, as well as the mac & cheese i'd brought from home. heheh... tak rasa meletup ke perut budak tu nanti ek?

Since golfman was also flying out to turkmenistan tonite the plan was to leave melaka early tapi tak kesampaian. kedebak kedebuk it was almost dark when we left, and being sunday i was caught in the crowd of people rushing back to kl. the jam started from linggi right up to nilai. adeh letih..... dah la bumper to bumper crawl, hujan renyai pulak tu. sampai kat rumah around 9.10 pm; mandi macam kilat, salin baju mengalahkan superman and out again back the klia route by 9.40pm.

Nasib baik cik Abe dah call earlier to check-in kalau tak kena jadi speed demon la pulak... dah la pagi-pagi tadi masa mula2 masuk highway kat tol central sugar, kena ngap dengan polis kat stretch yang 90km limit tu. masak ah, tunggu je la dapat surat cintan nanti!!

Ooh and almost forgot, oleh kerana the merry band of 3 termiss dinner sbb berkejar2an nak balik shah alam, elok selamat je deposit golfman kat klia maka kami pun menyinggah la kat night circle for late supper of nasi air & segala macam condiment & lauk pilihan.

Haaaa ini la baru betul2 FULL DAY hehehe -_-'

(hmmmm... i wonder if 'the chronicles of a demented supir-o' would make a good blog title !?! heheh)

Men

.... would always be boys at heart. they just cant resist tinkering with their latest 'toys' or gadgets can they?

Golfman says the car is mine, in fact he even officially handed the keys over to me the moment we got home yesterday.... but we know what that means right?! he was obviously dying to drive it to work so whats a gal to do but to oblige hehehe? and it wasnt until late this evening, after he'd satisfied himself with prying and prodding every nook & cranny, slot & crevice of the engine, body and interior... that i got the chance to test drive it.

Well, not bad. but i'm pretty surprised theres a huge difference in feel between a 5 series and a 3 series. after all its the same make, just a little smaller but its so light rasa macam melayang2 pulak mula2 tu. even the doors are lighter (the car sorta reverberated when i banged it shut being so used to the heavier car lol). of course the pick up is better so its more responsive when speed is needed but i still feel more secure with the other car when taking corners. maybe its just needs getting used to and adjusting. it feels about the same when cruising the highways but i must admit the smaller size is a bonus when squeezing into tight parking lots!!

The kids dubbed their father's 1st beemer bini muda wanda..... maybe this 2nd one could be bini muda wendy hehehe.

Hmmmm... i give him a week (maybe two at most) before his interest starts to wane and i get to claim 'my' car ;)

At long last..

... the wait is finally over *lounging back, wriggling toes & grinning madly*!!!!!

-no more nagging (gawd how i hate nagging) to get everyone ready and in the car before 7am
-no more rushing to beat the jams at 2 hotspots to kelana jaya and the other 2 hotspots back to shah alam.
-no more risking a burst artery (god forbid) for sprinting & punching in towards the very very last few seconds.
-no more nail biting in ultimate frustration because i'm stuck in the car instead of running free hehehe

Yup, we finally went to pick up the 'other' car so we're now back to one each, thank the good lord :)

Bliss bliss bliss !!

I get to claim that period of time, that glorious hour, between 7.10am - 8.10am as my very own yay!!

*still grinning*

Marriages

If you really think about it so many things can go wrong in a marriage..... but then again, so many things can also turn out alright !!! since life's a gamble anyway, for those of you who are hesitating out there, just take the plunge people :)

Today has been all about weddings.

A close relative finally found the right one at 44 and a big congratulations go out to the newly weds. she threw a very quiet & low key kenduri kesyukuran cum wedding reception for family & friends after zohor. indeed she looked every inch the radiant bride even though its been about a week since the nikah ceremony. semoga berbahagia dunia akhirat dan dilimpahi nikmat rahmatNYA.

Later in the day golfman & i were both invited to a pre-wedding meeting, which included a scrumptious dinner (graciously prepared by the tuan rumah herself). one of his golf buddies was marrying off his daughter in 2 weeks time and was putting together family & friends to help out with the ushering duties. the host used to be one of the senior vps so there'll be plenty of oilmen attending. and it came as no surprise that the hubs was appointed one of the 'oilmen usherers' since he'd certainly be in his element.... jgn brtukar jadi p.ramlee's orang minyak dah ler heheh.

Hmmm... rupanya ada jugak jejaka german yang kecik molek ek.

Workout Log
AM/aerobics - 45 mins/medium pace/dataran shah alam
AM/run - 4k/35 mins/tasik

Kecemerlangan

Cemerlang... surely a word that carries with it such high expectations. especially if we jazz it up with a couple of glam words or turn it into the national catch phrase like 'cemerlang, gemilang & terbilang'.

A heavy responsibility to carry.

Especially if you're a kid.

AH's school had a majlis anugerah kecemerlangan pelajar2 PMR & SPM this morning along with the annual PIBG meeting. 68 students went on stage to be personally presented with a pen and certificate by the shah alam mayor himself... which means AH & gang have been lucky enough to meet up with the previous MB and also the mayor over their pmr achievement. the spm recepients were also there looking pretty jubilant over their awards, and at spm level, they truly deserve it. for us malaysians whether we like it or not, spm is one of life's major crossroads.

The thing is what's our perception of the word 'cemerlang'? yes, we all want our kids to be cemerlang but sometimes i think we've all developed a sort of tunnel vision where the word is concerned. perform, perform, perform.... its all about the A's. now who's not proud of having a kid who comes up with straight A's, but at what cost? its ok if they are allowed to play as hard as we want them to work but sometimes, sometimes, we get so carried away that we heartlessly take away all the joy from their lives.

Case in point is AH's new pengetua. she's sooooo into discipline (during her speech she admitted to having majored in psychology but also admits to being a disciplinarian... a word that she actually had trouble pronouncing) she forgets that she's dealing with kids. kids are born full of hope & optimism.... until we heartlessly squash it dead that is. high school is not just a place where they gather knowledge about the world and their surrroundings, its also a place where they discover themselves. they need to interact and come to terms with their limits & boundaries.... and for that we need to accord them with a certain amount of freedom.

Discipline is necessary to maintain a certain level of order and self displine is needed if we want to keep improving ourselves. but like everything else, we should avoid extremes... even when it comes to something as necessary as discipline. teachers can insist on discipline all they want during the course of a school day but it surely doesnt bode well for the students if they're not allowed to let their hair down on certain special occasions like school matches & sportsday?!

Instruction was given that excessive cheering, face markings, related accessories like head gears or arm bands will not be tolerated.... the pengetua had determined that it's all related to 'rowdy behaviour'. ooh come on.... how can one generate motivation and inspiration in the fields through docility & meekness??? how can we produce champions when we put their spirits on a tight leash? and how can we keep the sporting spirit alive with the children when we ourselves are not sporting?

And with so much emphasis placed on academic achievement, surely it also doesnt bode well for the students if their annual ceria-ton (or concert day), an event which is very much looked forward to, might be scraped from the school calendar all in the name of keeping discipline?! sportsday and concertday are 2 events that's a must for any school, be it in shah alam or yokohama.... because thats when the kids get the opportunity to showcase their other talents.

We need to remember its not just about IQ, its also about emotional intelligence & social intelligence.... and a whole lot of other things that completes us as a person.

If we want kecemerlangan from the kids, we really do need to get things into its proper perspective.

Maulidur Rasul

Very very quiet on the home front this morning.... just a bunch of sleeping children (2 semi-adults actually) and extremely pampered kitty cats (theres 3 now thanks to mak & her new found role as catwoman).

I had to miss out on the perarakan maulidur rasul with my gang of officemates but i just couldnt squeeze in the morning practises into my already loaded schedule. it would have been fun being part of the state parade... you would end up quite sweaty & bothered in the sponsored 'costume' but fun nevertheless (a band of old farts goofing about lol).

As usual it was the tasik again for me. i wish i felt more safe & secure running along the roads of shah alam (its home after all) but the dog & monkey incident still haunts me so in the end its always, always, the tasik. it gets pretty boring sometimes making the same loop over and over buuuut.. i hate feeling scared more than i hate the boredom of repetition. theres usually lots of people about no matter the time of day (no dogs or monkeys for sure) and repetition can be rather theurapetic in its own way (or so i keep telling myself hehe).

So unless a running buddy miraculously turns up (i'm not giving up on turning my man into just that person but its gonna take awhile yet lol), its the same old same old.

AF came home late last nite for a nice long weekend break since his friday lectures were cancelled. unfortunately today, on another of his usual kl forays, he banged the avanza against another tiang, yet again (the same spot as before but this time its banged up pretty badly). gawd whats with him and his left side? his judgement really sucks big time.

Weell, accidents do happen i guess but he'll still have to face the music when golfman comes home saturday morning.

AH seems happy enough after her outing to sunway with ainal & gang. there was the F1 school thingy followed by a nice long session of ice skating. thank god she has quite a level head on her shoulders. its actually a blessing she pulled out of that sinking relationship when she did. she probably would've ended up hurting herself even more by letting it drag on. but for a 15 year old to put her foot down and say 'either you love me or you dont', especially to a guy she's been hero worshipping for as long as i can remember.... now that took a lot of guts!!! power to you my darling!! insyallah theres already someone better out there just waiting to be discovered ;)

Now to my other darling who cant be home this time round due to his endless stream of assignments.... ijat sayang, nanti ma cuba jenguk ek when abah comes home. luvya lots missya plenty.

Workout Log
AM/run - 8k/tasik/ forgot all about timing but it must've been pretty slow bcos i wasnt sweating as much as usual. hmmm..

Reminders

Reminder 1.

The January issue of Mayo Clinic Health Letter lists some of the benefits of 30 minutes of exercise a day:

Lower blood pressure: A reduction of 5 to 10 millimeters of mercury (mm Hg) is possible. In some cases, that’s enough to prevent or reduce the need for blood pressure medications.

Improve cholesterol: Exercise often increases the concentration of high-density lipoprotein (HDL or “good” cholesterol in the blood), especially when accompanied by weight loss. Exercise also helps reduce triglyceride levels.

Prevent or manage type 2 diabetes: Exercise helps insulin work better, lowering blood sugar. - diabetes is a great concern of mine, very high risk from my paternal side.

Manage weight: Coupling exercise with a healthy diet is the best way to shed fat and maintain a healthier body composition.

Prevent osteoporosis: Exercise may increase bone density and protect against bone mass decline, especially if weight-bearing activities are involved.

Prevent cancer: Exercise has been shown to strengthen the immune system, improve circulation, reduce body fat and speed digestion. Each has a role in preventing cancer, particularly cancers of the colon, prostate, uterine lining and breast. - from my maternal side.

Maintain mental well-being: Exercise may help reduce stress, improve mild-to-moderate depression and anxiety, improve sleep and boost moods.

Increase energy and stamina: A lack of energy often results from inactivity, not age. - hear, hear..... theres hope yet for old farts like me heheh. lets get active people!!!!

Reminder 2.

ScienceDaily (Feb. 9, 2008) — The consequences of quitting exercise may be greater than previously thought, according to a new study from the U.S. Department of Energy’s Lawrence Berkeley National Laboratory that determined that the weight gained during an exercise hiatus can be tough to shed when exercise is resumed at a later date.

The study, conducted by Paul Williams of Berkeley Lab’s Life Sciences Division, found that the key to staying trim is to remain active year-round, year-after-year, and to avoid seasonal and irregular exercise patterns. Most of all, don’t quit. Failure to do so may be a contributing factor in the nation’s obesity epidemic. It should prompt people to think twice before taking a break from their exercise regimens, despite the pressures of family and work obligations, or waning motivation.

Using data collected from the National Runners’ Health Study, Williams found that the impacts of increasing and decreasing vigorous exercise aren’t the same among all runners. At distances above 20 miles per week in men and 10 miles per week in women, the pounds gained by running less were about the same as the pounds lost by running more. At these exercise levels, the effects of training and quitting training are comparable, and the weight gains and losses associated with changes in exercise levels are probably reversible.

However, Williams found that people who didn’t run as many miles per week face an uphill battle if they want to lose the pounds accumulated during an exercise hiatus. At these less intense levels, an interruption in exercise produces weight gain that is not lost by simply resuming the same exercise regimen.

“At lower mileages, there is asymmetric weight gain and loss from increasing and decreasing exercise, leading to an expected weight gain from an exercise hiatus,” says Williams. “In other words, if you stop exercising, you don’t get to resume where you left off if you want to lose weight.”

Specifically, Williams compared 17,280 men and 5,970 women who decreased their running distance with 4,632 men and 1,953 women who increased their running distance over a 7.7-year period. He found that runners who decreased their distance from five to zero miles per week gained four times as much weight as those who decreased their distance from 25 to 20 miles per week. He also found that people who started running after an exercise layoff didn’t lose weight until their mileage exceeded 20 miles per week in men, and 10 miles per week in women.

Adeh susah betui laaa.... dah active nak kena keep active pulak tu. but then nobody said keeping fit & healthy was a breeze now did they?

hmmmm its definitely a life long commitment. takpe la mudah2an tak nyusahkan anak2 nanti, insyallah.

Keeping busy

When one is in a troubled state of mind keeping busy is probably one of the best options. dwelling on it will only make things worse so.... busy busy busy. and when one tires of all that running about, sleep isnt too bad a choice either. you conk off and next thing you know... "hey, its another day" ;)

Then of course theres always, always peace & solace in the AlMighty.


Workout Log
AM/run - 4k/35 mins/ tasik

A Week without..

... the man.

Functioning and managing as only half of a complete whole is nothing new but its been awhile. Abe's been home for the past couple of months so it needs some getting used to... again. the good part is, this time its just for a week.. the bad part is, he might be reassigned to the caspian sea for yet another undetermined length of time.

Gawd, how i hate managing alone.

But..... we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.

One of the compensations of being left behind is having some space to call my own... which means i get to run in the mornings again and maybe be able to move back to a certain level of consistency. i find that without regular exercise fatigue sets in more easily and i just dont have room for that in my life. not with so many depending on me.... to stay sane, happy, healthy & functioning.


Workout Log
AM/Slow Jog - 4k/40 mins/ tasik

Growth

My heart goes out to my lil girl.

What you did certainly took a lot of guts but he shouldnt be allowed to keep on breaking your heart. and however painful it might be right now, you will overcome this insyallah.

WE will always love you no matter what.

Helpless

As parents it hurts us to no end when we sometimes have to take on the role of a helpless bystander.. while our children battle the challenges that life seems to constantly throw at all of us; challenges that are actually necessary for our growth.

The urge to shield & to protect is sooo strong that sometimes we literally have to force ourselves to step back and not interfere. heck we love them with all our heart & soul... so its only natural that we'd want to intervene when a mistake seems to be in the making. aaaah, how frequently we've interfered with the ready justification of " i did it because i love you"!!

But makan garam dulu doesnt guarantee that we're always right and what is best for us doesnt necessarily mean it would be best for them. sometimes they need to go through the heartache & hardship to become stronger; they need to make the mistakes so that they can learn from it and become better.

Still, knowing all this doesnt make it any easier.

Just understand one thing though, mama's always here for you.. and you.. and you, no matter what. selagi hayat di kandung badan mama akan mendoakan yang terbaik.

Where were you?

" i walked for miles along the beach.. searching endlessly for someone wonderful to step out of the darkness and change my life. it never crossed my mind that the person could be me "
- ANON


i've been soo busy, i've almost lost touch with myself....


Workout Log.
Run/PM - 3km/forgot about keeping time/sect. 9

Big words

".... orchestrating learning opportunities.... "

Management books are interesting tapi kalau the authors tetiba get these 'syiok sendiri' attacks, agak leceh la nak faham. apa salahnya kalau keep it simple and direct but nooooooo.... nampaknya the more berbelit the better. why? baru nampak macam dia pandai kot sebab the masses tak paham.

Sebenarnye simplifying things and making it easily understood lagi challenging, lagi menunjukkan ke'terra'an seseorang tu bukan sebaliknye. if only most writers could understand that, senang hidup.

Golfman pun actually terpengaruh jugak dengan budaya 'lets make it berbelit2' ni (skit2 la). there was this unfinished report that he brought home and although he kept singing about it the whole weekend, tapi tak jugak buat2. i knew he was going to throw in a last minute effort... with me in the equation somehow. sooo when the somewhat unscheduled sweet talking/kissing/caressing started, i couldnt help but laugh. alaaaa trick lama la bang hehehe... quite obviously an udang sebalik mee/ scooter sebalik lori kinda situation, dah tau sangat. Abe weh, tak butter up pun kita tolong jugak la, takkan nak biar Abe bersengkang mata sorang2 kan ;)

So he whips out a couple of management books and shows me some of the important sounding terms that could be used to spice up his report.

Hah?

Iisssh.... toksah nak ikut2 sangat la all the bombastic words my darling. keeping it sweet & simple should be the order of the day. biar ramai yang faham and appreciate what you're trying to get across; not swayed by the 'glamorous' feel tapi bila kaji habuk pun tarak.

Lets just leave that to our dear politicians... after all they've turned it into an artform.


Workout Log
Aerobics/Am - 40 mins/mid to high/dataran shah alam